Words

My knee-jerk reaction to what I read was complex and visceral. To state the outcome simply, I not only disagreed but deeply resented, even despised, those who thought that way. I thought to myself, I’ll use whatever bloody words I like.

I guess a feeling like that assails us all from time to time.

What got me going this time? It was a letter to the editor of The Dominion Post (January 1, 2016). The correspondent (a woman) asserted that a man saying “thanks, sweetiepie” or “thanks, luv” or “thanks, dear” to a woman “is sexist, patronising and outdated”.

I saw red until I considered blogging about it and taking a more rational look at my initial reaction.

Terms of endearment can certainly be used in a patronising way; there’s no denying that. But are they intrinsically patronising? I think not.

Are they sexist? They do discriminate, I’ll grant you. There’s no way I’d be calling a man “sweetie pie”.

Out of date? Possibly. But not everyone has the same attitude and I resist censorship of words for adult use. I, for example, dislike hearing foul language, but I don’t write letters to the editor using derogatory put-downs about people’s freedom to use it. The characters in my novels even swear a little when driven to extreme.

We sanitise language (including endearments) at the risk of creating a duller culture, a greyer world.

www.thomaswdevine.com.