A Small Matter, Really

A Small Matter, Really

It was one of those moments.

I was at Clarion, arguably the premier science fiction and fantasy writer's workshop. It's a grueling six-week long process where you write a short story each week and have it critiqued by your fellow classmates as well as that week's teacher, who is always an established writer or editor in the field.

It was my turn that week to have a story critiqued, and my story was pretty much straight-up science fiction. Black holes. Time travel. Weird future stuff. Aliens. The comments from everyone were extremely positive. When they were done, it was time to hear from that week's instructor.

Greg Bear. One of my heroes since I was young. I'd loved his book, Eon, which opened my eyes to big, cosmic science fiction stories. I'd also adored his smaller works, like Blood Music and his fantasy stuff, like The Infinity Concerto.

He said something very close to this: "I don't know if I have much to say. I wouldn't change a thing. This story is ready. Send it out!"

It was probably the moment that made me realize that maybe I had a shot as a fiction writer.

Now, at that time (Summer, 1999) I had already published a novel, The Glass Prison, set in the Forgotten Realms, published by Wizards of the Coast. I'd had a couple of short stories published in anthologies, such as A Narrowed Gaze in Realms of the Arcane and The Rose Window in Realms of Mystery (later chosen to be in the anthology Best of the Realms). But this was all very game-related stuff, and I had very little confidence in myself that I could make it in the world of original fiction.

To say that I was on cloud nine would be to understate. Clarion instructors rarely say what Greg said (at no other time during my six weeks do I remember that happening). I was elated! Never mind that Greg later that same day dismissed all my game-related writing as nothing more than "good practice." I was elated!

When Clarion was over, like everyone else, I was exhausted mentally and physically. Even after I recovered, I was thrust back into the ongoing big project at work, which of course was nothing but a little thing called Third Edition Dungeons & Dragons. So I guess it's small wonder that I didn't get around to even looking at my Clarion stories for almost a year. When I did, however, the first one I zeroed in on was the story that had got so much praise, and the one Greg had liked so well. At the time, it was called A Very Small Matter, Really. I made a few changes suggested by my classmates, and then sent it out.

When it got rejected, I sent it again.

And again.

And again.

Sometimes, many months would pass before I would hear from the editor I sent it to. In the meantime, I polished some of my other Clarion stories and sent a few of them out as well. I sold one to Amazing Stories magazine. I also wrote published another novel, Of Aged Angels, and sold a few more newer stories. I would go through periods (particularly while working on Malhavoc Press stuff) of being too busy with game design to think about fiction writing or submitting fiction. Sometimes years would pass where I just couldn't fit it into my schedule. But eventually, I'd come around to it again. And when I did, the first thing I would do was submit A Very Small Matter, Really again.

I honed it over the years, and shortened the title to just A Small Matter, Really. All in all, I sent it to ten different editors before I finally found a home for it at Escape Pod. I'm really proud of that, not just because I personally really like podcast fiction--and Escape Pod is the premier source of it on the planet--but because when you take a look at their audience, they're as big or bigger than pretty much any other market buying short science fiction stories. 

Escape Pod will be publishing the audio and ebook version of A Small Matter, Really this summer. In a way, as absurd as it is to say, because of the place of importance that that story has held in my heart for so long, it feels like my writing career can finally get started now.