Priorities…

It’s been a strange Xmas in the Morris household… and it got me thinking about my current situation.

Over the last few months of 2015 – I have been feeling decidedly like a work-machine (which I don’t remember signing up for when I became a teacher) and I’m really not sure where it all started to go wrong. I used to pride myself in achieving a work-life balance – or even a work-work-life balance as I am a children’s writer as well as a teacher.

I’ve always been quite good at just getting the job done when it comes to a pile of stuff you don’t really want to do to make room for the real and pleasurable things in life. However, these days, the scales are heavily weighted down on the wrong side. (This reminds me of a funny story: one day I  had so much marking, my car started beeping at me; it thought my marking pile was a passenger who needed to buckle up!).

I am not happily going to accept this without putting up a fight.

Something has to change or I’ll spend month in month out moaning about a job I used to love (I hate moaners!) or worse still, end up signed off with stress which is happening to so many teachers around me – in the first few years of working in this profession, this was unheard of!

let’s face it – teaching doesn’t look set to become any easier so that change is going to have to come from me. My attitude is going to have to adapt or I’m going to miss out on valuable life which is ticking on regardless of how many observations we’ve passed, how many deadlines we’ve met or how many apathetic students we’ve managed to attain that C for. Controversial question: but shouldn’t some students be allowed to fail so they can learn they do actually need to work hard  and that’s nothing is for free in this life?

Teaching is on a fairly good pay grade which means it’s very hard to jump ship into something that will keep paying the bills you’ve taken on so it very gradually becomes a self-imposed ball and chain around your neck. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not out there only teaching your kids half-heartedly, on the contrary, this is the only part of the job left that is enjoyable and rewarding so they still get 100% of me. However, the rest of the job and it’s ever-increasing tick box duties will no longer get 100% from me – it’s unsustainable and I refuse to let it bleed me dry.

What’s important to me is my family, my animals, my friends, my writing ambitions and my health – so school, you come in at 5th place (see, you’re still important for paying the bills but you can’t have it all) I’m afraid and you’re just going to have to get used to it because I will always prioritise the above. I will always give my best but I won’t give more than that – that’s exclusive to positions 1 -4 :)

2016 is going to be about being a good daughter, wife, friend and animal mummy; it’s going to be about getting my writing mojo up and running again and it’s going to be about finding joy in every day life.

It’s time to wake up…