Weird Science: When Sharing the Childcare Load Backfires

Conventional wisdom: When it comes to taking care of small children, women want more help from their partners. They want the load shared as equally as possible, right? And the dad who does his part will have a happier, more satisfied wife...right?

The surprising news: Parents who share care-giving actually experience MORE conflict with their partner than when mom is stuck doing the lion's share, finds a report in the January issue of Developmental Psychology. What DID lead to a smoother road at home was when dad spent ample time playing with his child. But when fathers started doing more concrete care-giving tasks—meal prep, baths, etc.—the couples in the study actually became less supportive and more undermining of one another. (Stuff like more critical remarks or attempts to 'outdo' one another.)

What?? I, for one, straight-up love when my husband helps out in any way, as well as enjoy when he plays with our daughter. But study
Do you find that more conflicts arise when daddy's on duty? Do you ever see yourself slipping into that "gatekeeper" role?