What’s Brewing – Our Journey Through Cancer – Need To Know

Being married to a military man all these years has definitely changed my vocabulary. I use words that the average civilian doesn’t understand; like o’dark-thirty, most skoshy, squared away, and that ever annoying  – need to know.

But isn’t need to know what we think we want? A free for all information stream that answers all our questions? To know everything? Now? All at once? Often to our demise?

Soldiers get that; it’s part of their DNA; to act only on what’s been given to them, until they need to know more. Because too much information is often dangerous. It causes some to get stuck in the details, others to fixate on the solution instead of the process, and has even been known to turn a few would-be heroes into deserters.

But, that’s where cancer has put us; in the season of, need to know. 

This past week Bud and I met with our family physician, Dr. Knopf. And we came away with three more pieces of the puzzle to fit into the big picture. 1. We have an oncologist; Dr. Orwoll, well known for her dedicated research, which has gained her a great reputation for being able to precisely match the right chemo to the right cancer with incredible results. 2. We have an appointment; December 21st, where the next few steps will be revealed. And 3, we have a location; Providence Medical Building. Baby steps. One inch at a time. Toward the finish line.

Nevertheless, on the morning of our appointment with Dr. Knopf, visions of PIC lines, nausea, hair loss, fatigue, immune deficiency, and the never ending stream of doctor visits, niggled at my overactive imagination and broke through those lines of need to know, leaving me terrified and exhausted.

Then an email, from a friend who’s been where we are, gently lifted me up from the pit.

Sandy, don’t look at the whole package all at once. Deal only with what you can do today. There will be strength for tomorrow. Just take of this moment. You’re in good hands.. The Lord has His eye on all the details.  May you both see the parting of the waters, as you bravely walk forward in this new frontier, and meet the most incredible people you will ever meet … and enlarge your family. You will have stories, and moments, that only you will be able to tell.

Thank you Bonnie Knopf, for teaching us how to walk this journey with grace, humility, and patience. And so I’m thinking; what if there’s more to 1 Corinthians 10:13 than we’ve known before?

What if our need to know everything, is more we can bear? What if God’s incremental offers of information are better than our need to know now demands? What if we’re stronger, more focused, less fearful, and more curiously joyful, when we don’t know what’s coming around the bend? What if our need for too much information is more costly to our faith than too little?

Thank you for sharing this journey with us, as we soldier on, For His glory!

Love and joy, Sandy

More later …

What’s Brewing – Our Journey Through Cancer – Need To Know was first posted on December 14, 2015 at 8:05 am.
©2013 "Life Over Latte". Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this article in your feed reader, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please contact me at sandy.snavely@frontier.com