Quiet Matters
Free time is a blessing and a curse, and a strange gift from the Universe. I now understand why some monks retreat to caves for years of quiet contemplation and meditation. It is in this quietude that we see exactly how far we have evolved on our journey. In the absence of distraction, we are forced to fully be with ourselves, and in these moments, we find out precisely how content we really are. Needless to say, free time is a humbling experience.
For most of my adult life, I was a workaholic, and when I discovered that spiritual maturity was possible, I redirected all of my time and energy into voraciously seeking and striving for enlightenment. Regardless of my obsession, I have always filled my every waking moment with activities. It wasn't until fairly recently that I understood why I kept myself so busy.
My job as an arborist on a Massachusetts resort island is very seasonal. The three months of summer are extremely busy, spring and fall are moderately busy and winter is painfully slow. And it was in this dead of winter that I first discovered the wonder and the horror of free time. At first, free time felt liberating -- time to finally breathe and relax and time for reflection and quiet contemplation. However, after a short period of this wondrous reprieve, the horror of "What the hell do I do now?" barreled in like a tsunami!
It was in this vulnerable moment that my true spiritual journey began, as this quietude opened the door for my Inner-Teacher to guide me through deep and honest introspection and allow me to notice and acknowledge all of the vices that were obscuring my true worth and all of the virtues that bring me joy. Free time gave me the opportunity to forgive myself, which led to self-compassion, self-acceptance and eventually self-love. Free time also allowed me to recognize my negative emotions as they arose and surrender them through The Letting Go Mechanism. And finally, free time enabled me to embark on the transformation process and the eventual embodiment of the virtues of peace.
For most of my adult life, I was a workaholic, and when I discovered that spiritual maturity was possible, I redirected all of my time and energy into voraciously seeking and striving for enlightenment. Regardless of my obsession, I have always filled my every waking moment with activities. It wasn't until fairly recently that I understood why I kept myself so busy.
My job as an arborist on a Massachusetts resort island is very seasonal. The three months of summer are extremely busy, spring and fall are moderately busy and winter is painfully slow. And it was in this dead of winter that I first discovered the wonder and the horror of free time. At first, free time felt liberating -- time to finally breathe and relax and time for reflection and quiet contemplation. However, after a short period of this wondrous reprieve, the horror of "What the hell do I do now?" barreled in like a tsunami!
It was in this vulnerable moment that my true spiritual journey began, as this quietude opened the door for my Inner-Teacher to guide me through deep and honest introspection and allow me to notice and acknowledge all of the vices that were obscuring my true worth and all of the virtues that bring me joy. Free time gave me the opportunity to forgive myself, which led to self-compassion, self-acceptance and eventually self-love. Free time also allowed me to recognize my negative emotions as they arose and surrender them through The Letting Go Mechanism. And finally, free time enabled me to embark on the transformation process and the eventual embodiment of the virtues of peace.
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