Give Fear the Backseat

Growing up I had a butt load of fear. I was afraid of everything.  Afraid of what people though, afraid of messing up, afraid of not being adequate enough, either for other people or my own self expectations.

A lot of the fear I had was placed on me by myself, but I also had a hefty dose placed on me by others.

I’ve overcome a lot of the fear, I don’t expect quite so much out of myself (though I still tend to be extremely driven), and I don’t worry so much about what people thing about me (my wife says I don’t care enough).

So what changed?  What changed my life from being hidden behind 4 walls, anti-social, and a nervous small person to becoming someone who loves being around people.  What took away my nervousness and turned me into a confident (sometimes too much so) person?

It wasn’t some 5 step plan, wasn’t some quick fix answer.  It was making choices.  I came to a place where I literally asked myself if I wanted to continue to live my life in this state of fear.

And so I made a choice, I moved out of state chasing a dream and a hope that I had no idea if it would work.  That was my first choice.  It got me outside my comfort zone, outside of my box, and from there it was simply one choice after another.  It was choosing to go outside my comfort zone and meet new people.  It was going out of my comfort zone and going to college, it was traveling to other countries, it was joining the military, it was having a child and not wanting her to grow up with fear but rather with a picture of her parents tackling anything.

That’s it.  No fancy recipe.  Make choices.  Sure those choices aren’t easy, and you will get knots in your stomach when you make them, but make them anyway.  Everyone you make will get easier, and soon you will find fear has no place anymore.

Get out, explore, have adventures, travel (this one is huge, if you can travel to another country do so) it gives you perspective on how big the world is and how much more there is to learn.

Fear is a joke, slap it around and show it who’s boss.  You’ve got this.