The Fiver | An entire nation went off to party

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The Republic of Ireland made it to Euro 2016 on Tuesday night, joining a list of qualifiers which includes Northern Ireland, Wales, England, Iceland, Albania, Slovakia, Hungary, Not Scotland, Not Holland and a five-a-side team consisting of Eric Pickles, David Dickinson, Andrew Neil, Moomin and the Andrex puppy. Considering Ireland were a shower for a large part of the qualification process, their eventual play-off success against Bosnia-Herzegovina last night either says a lot about Uefa’s decision to allow 512 teams into the finals, or the way Roy Keane looks at people without saying anything or blinking while taking long, deep, deliberate breaths through his nose.

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