Are You Being Present with Others?
Have you observed this?
Recently, I was standing in line at the grocery store. Directly in front of me is a woman in her mid-30’s talking on her phone. It’s obvious that the conversation she is having is not of a serious nature.
When it’s her turn to check out, she remains on the phone the entire time, never pausing to acknowledge the cashier. The cashier and I briefly catch each other’s eyes. My expression is one of, “Is this woman going to stay on the phone and ignore you?” Her look says, “Yes. This is a common occurrence.” The woman on the phone swipes her credit card, doesn’t wait for her receipt, and continues to talk while walking towards the exit.
“That was rude,” I say.
“You’d be surprised how often that happens,” she states.
I realize that I have a wonderful opportunity to be present with the cashier and let her know how much I appreciate her assisting me with my groceries.
While she scans and bags my items, I mindfully and silently send her wishes of peace, joy, and love. As she hands me my receipt, I smile and tell her to have a wonderful rest of the day. She says, “Thank you very much,” and smiles back.
We have numerous encounters each day. Occasionally these encounters are with someone we don’t know, such as a cashier or salesperson in a store, but mostly they are with those we do know, like spouses, children, extended family, friends, and co-workers. I’m going to give you one tip that will absolutely improve any encounter and relationship you have and it’s a simple one…
Each time you have an encounter or conversation with someone, take a second to become mindful and attempt to remain in a state of presence while you are with them.
When you are present with another person, you are actively listening to them. In doing so, you are letting them know that in that exact moment, they are the most important person to you. We have an inherent desire to be acknowledged, to be listened to, to feel we matter.
Think of times when you have been with someone who is texting, reading email, surfing the web, etc. while you are with them. What message are they sending? The message is I’m here with you, but you are not as important as what I’m doing on my phone at this exact moment.
Just two days ago, I was having dinner out with my daughter. I discretely took the following picture of a family beside us.
Both kids on ipads and dad on his iphone. No one was speaking to each other. If this is the new “Family Night Out” then we are in big trouble.
If you are seeking ways to be more present, then remind yourself each time you meet or speak with someone, that you stop and become mindful. Truly be with them. In doing so, you will be offering them compassion, love, and acceptance, and they will feel it directly from the highest part of you…your Being.
I hope this helps you in your spiritual and personal growth.
Peace and blessings always,
P.S. What do you think? Leave me a comment or question below. I read each and every one of them.
