I Don’t Want a Dog But Who Asked Me?

Back in February, I sent my kid off to volunteer for the Humane Society. She loved doing it, and I loved getting her out of the house and doing something remotely healthy. But it backfired on me, because she came home with a dog. (Okay, maybe I actually signed the papers, but you don’t understand. I had to. They were in love.)

It’s November now. I’m sure you’ll be astonished to learn that I’m the one that walks the dog. I mostly don’t mind, though. I like that I can walk late at night and at...