Do We Do That????? - From Andrew Grey

Dear Andrew


Seen from the other side of the pond, some things I often read in romance are really strange. For example, when a guy goes on a date and wants to look really good, he puts on a silk shirt. I've been around quite a bit, but never saw one of them – or maybe I did, but it was plain white and hidden under a suit. Along the same line, do you really wear a tuxedo to go to the theater or to a restaurant? Here, except for a highly formal ceremony, it would be considered overdressed.Another thing is big strong cowboys drinking milk with their meals or two guys in a fancy restaurant drinking milk with their tenderloin? To me, that's just weird. Well, I guess there are thing you find puzzling in Europe.
Kindest regards,Madeleine

Dear Madeleine
Oh my goodness.  You hit on a good one.  There are many things in romance novels which do not reflect real life.  They are put there for dramatic effect and to try to give the reader a sense of how the character is feeling.  I have an extensive wardrobe and I don't own a silk shirt.  I have owned one in my life.  But a character in a novel may put on a silk shirt to show how excited or special he thinks the evening will be.  Its the authors way of helping to convey that specialness.  
As for a tuxedo.  I own one and I do not wear it to go to the theater or a restaurant in general.  It is over dressing.  However i have worn my tuxedo out for an evening when I was with ladies who were dressed in evening wear.  I have also work my tux at my wedding and other more formal affairs.   Or at a convention when I want to be noticed in a crowd.  Put on the tux for the evening and you get noticed.  But to answer your question directly, in the US, men we do not go around wearing tuxedos all the time.   However as an author I have dressed my characters in tuxedos for an evening out because its an incredibly special night and they are celebrating or want to show their partner what they mean to them. 
As for drinking mil, I really can't help you with that one much.  I can say that I don't see a lot of adults ordering milk in restaurants.   I think its another of those licenses authors use to try to convey a mindset for feeling rather than reflect real life.  In this country, milk is considered wholesome.  
As a recap, in books of any kind, clothes and behavior often are used to try to get a glimpse of character insight or feeling.   With visual media sometimes its easier because other senses are directly involved, but with the written word, the author has to use the tools at their disposal.  
Hugs and loveAndrew

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