Conversations With the Boy

Oma and Satchel, August 16, 2010

Looking Good ~

During a birthday party for Brooke, I sat in the corner hanging out with the little kids. They were each piping up with how old they were when Satchel reaches up and pats me on the head and says, “My Oma is 62, but she looks really good for her age. She could pass for 60!”

November 2010

Hatfields and McCoys

My ten-year-old grandson calls and says hi Oma, it’s me, Satchel, and I say hi Satchel, it’s me, Oma. He asks if we are related to the Hatfields and McCoys. I say no, we’re related to the Chatfields and Hoys. He says WHAT?!? I say, I can tell by your voice you’re disappointed. Our family is not nearly as interesting and I’m sorry, but the only connection is that they rhyme. They’re from the South, we’re from the North. He says, quite sadly, oh, right, okay, bye Oma. I say okay, bye Satchel.

I’m curious as to why he’s watching that show on TV, on a school night, at that hour, not to mention that he attends a Waldorf school that frowns on television. I’ll bet his mother’s not home.

May 2013

Tupperware!

My dilemma is solved: Tupperware! I saw a cartoon with two older women paying their respects to their friend lying in an open Tupperware casket, with the caption, “Edna would be so pleased… look – Tupperware!”

My grandson asked me if I wanted to be buried or cremated. I told him cremated because it’s less expensive and makes a smaller footprint on the earth. Then I told him the REAL reason I don’t want to be buried is because I don’t want the bugs to eat me. He decided he’d be cremated too. I said he was a little premature in his planning, and I prefer that he go after me, but that I didn’t imagine either one of us was proposing leaving anytime soon.

And now you’re wondering why I’m having this conversation with a ten-year-old. Well, he asked.

October 2013

Anger Issues

Satchel asks, “Oma, do you know anyone with anger issues?”

I snort and say, “Do you mean besides nearly everyone in our family?”

Then we talk about Greek mythology and he tests me on all the gods and goddesses and thank Zeus, I remember. I can’t remember where I left my keys or my purse, but I’m pretty darn good recalling the underworld, Hermes, and Aphrodite.

January 2014