New and Improved Wedding Vows

Four years ago today, I made my original wedding vows to one Frank Rose. Of course, I would marry him all over again, but after forty-eight months of matrimonial bliss, my vows would be a little less Hallmark romantic and a little more realistic.

Here are my new and improved wedding vows: 

Frank...

Despite the fact that I feel many of your outfits, should be deemed infits that should never leave the house, I won’t question your fashion sense and will let you express yourself through your colorful clothing tastes.

I will support you seeing the new “Star Wars” in the actual movie theater as many times as you want.

I will accept the fact that you are not and will never be morning person, therefore I take on full A.M. responsibilities including making coffee, taking the dogs out, and serving as your sexy snooze button.

Though I cannot fathom how someone as burly and hairy as you can be cold all the time, I will not make fun of you sitting around shivering under a “granny quilt,” even though it is a balmy fifty degrees outside.

I will laugh—and loud—at your jokes even if I’ve heard them before and they are not funny…just for the record, they are never funny.

My motto will be, “Let him eat steak,” at least once a week. 

I will never give up on you learning to play more than “Chinese Cats” (which is not a real song, by the way) on the guitar I bought your over three years ago. And, I’ll be in the front row at every show when you become an octogenarian rock star.

I will love your dog, Rufus, as much as you do.,,even though he is definitely somewhere on the canine spectrum.  

I will be nice to your mother…at least, 93% of the time.

I will never forget to record “Gotham” again.

Above all else, I will strive to make you feel as safe and special and beautiful and loved as you make me feel every minute of every day.

Happy Fourth Anniversary, Frank Rose. Here’s to four hundred and forty-four more. Cheers. To Us.