Paragraphs of Power

The opening paragrahhs of my adult fantasy are up for a competition on another blog. I'd appreciate a vote from any of you who care to visit http://paragraphsofpower.blogspot.com/ and find my contribution. It's number 9 and is titled 'The Seared Sky'.
Whether you vote or not, I'd really appreciate any comments; favourable or otherwise. Authors always need feedback.
Thanks.