The Fiver | Those who consider brazen front to be a tactic worth up to 10 points a season

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KLOPTIMISM

The new Liverpool manager Jürgen Klopp calmly pulled up a chair, sat down wearing a broad, friendly, welcoming smile, took a sip of water, and started swinging a few metaphorical haymakers this way and that. First he gave his withering verdict on the state – just look at it – of journalism in this country. “All the people told me about the British press, so it’s up to you to show me you are all liars.” Then he rollocked the photographers gathered outside his hotel, training their lenses on his window. “Stop making photos. I go to this side of my room, photograph. I go to the other, photograph. It would be really nice if you leave me there.” Finally he delivered a warning shot across the bows of José Mourinho, manager of fellow mid-table concern Chelsea. “I’m a totally normal guy, I’m the Normal One,” he quipped, shamelessly plagiarising material from Avram Grant, one of the biggest comedians of the last 10 years. Hey, talent borrows, genius steals.

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