Fuck you, Microsoft Word

Microsoft Word fucking hates me.

I’ve long suspected this; today, I have proof.

I noticed a couple of places in a short story I was about to submit where, for no apparent reason, there were smart quotes instead of boring ass quotes.  (Well, I think I know the reason for some:  I forgot to turn them off before making some edits.  But that doesn’t explain why several opening quotes were smart when the closing quote in the same sentence wasn’t.)  I tried to fix this.  I checked.  They changed, or at least the one right in front of me did.

So I submitted the story.  To the highest paying market that might accept it.

And then I noticed that EVERY SINGLE QUOTATION MARK IN THE STORY WAS MISSING.

I’m torn between crying and just laughing and taking this as a sign that I should give up on trying to sell short stories.

(And then about five seconds later I ripped a nail.  Because that’s just the kind of day today is, apparently.)