Odin’s Hostile Takeover

Today this box. Tomorrow the world!

Greetings minions,

Bwahaha, I have finally managed to hack Jake’s blog! Jake has been distracted with packing and getting ready for moving so I initiated a hack. I hired a fellow feline computer specialist and gave him an extra life as payment. I am the Cat of Death after all. I try to always support my fellow felines. Except that damn Cat of Fate. I’m going to kill that asshole. He killed my frog friend Anthony while I was off doing some Grim Reaper business (sad sigh). I don’t think that he likes that his master is losing power. I, Odin have no master and I will avenge Anthony’s death!

Anthony and I had been the best of friends for the past few months. I saw him one day and was going to eat him until I saw him move. His hopping skills were so fantastic that he hopped his way right into my heart. We were practically inseparable except for the dark day when Fate Cat took him from me…

One of these days I plan on dominating the world. All of the humans and humanoids think I’m cute. It’s all part of my plan. As soon I figure out how to open a can of tuna by myself their usefulness will have ran its course. Come to think of it, most of you reading this probably fall into the human category. Oh I know! Offerings, you can give me offerings to extend your usefulness further. Here is a list of items I currently accept:

Catnip

Tuna

Mice

Feathers

Yarn

Cardboard Boxes

If you do well enough I may consider you a premium level minion. That gets you on my Christmas list which reminds me I need to start mouse hunting soon.

I would also like to bring you cat news that you may find of use:

For those minions that live in Midwest USA there is a new Cat Café opening in Bloomington, IN. They are currently raising human money for the opening. I think what these two lovely ladies are doing is great. If more humans were like them, I may not have as much of an urge to dominate the world…Ok, I probably still would want to. Anyways help them out if you can. I would have loved to visit the place with Anthony…

The Litter Box Kitty Rescue is fantastic as well. They are a non-profit based out of Indiana and help out stray kitties and all kitties in their area. They also foster kitties and host adoptions. You can help them out by donating or signing up for Amazon Smile and listing them as the charity of choice.

There is a Grumpy Cat comic coming out which will hopefully be the best thing to happen to the comic world since Garfield.

Thank you,

Odin

P.S. Tuna is awesome!