Accepting the Path

Before we can take our lives forward, we must accept what's happened to us in the past. While I don't believe in dwelling in the past– because you end up missing the great things happening around you in the present when you're stuck in your pain– we must acknowledge where we've been, even though it hurts and it's embarrassing.

I could make a list of events that have happened in my life that haven't been pleasant, that have involved painful losses, that have constantly forced me to keep myself moving forward even when I didn't want to. There are a number have events that I'm embarrassed about, particularly because I thought certain people were more truthful than they were. But the reality is that they happened. I work on shaking them off and move on.

I can't change them. I can't go backward. But what I can do is– despite the pain– look back and focus on what I learned from them. While we aren't happy about the way that past relationships might have ended, the good part is that I'm sure we learned something. And if you don't think you learned something then you have some work to do. Life is about learning. After all, if there were nothing to learn, we probably wouldn't be here.

However, once we accept they happened and we take an inventory of what we learned, what we are grateful for (an unhealthy relationship being over is something to be glad about), it is then that we can go forward because then the chances are good we won't repeat the past mistakes.