#AskRuby September 2015

Here are some brilliant questions and my answers for #AskRuby - keep them coming.  Send me your burning questions over on twitter with #AskRuby.  

Pascal Leroux @PascalLeroux
What's your opinion regarding SSRIs vs mental illness? #AskRuby @Rubywax

I thank the Lord each day for SSRI’ s, without them I wouldn’t be able to read your question, let alone sit up.  If you have a serious mental illness why would you not take them and make yourself suffer even more?  Drugs are far from perfect but it’s all we’ve got. You have to do therapy along with it but first I think, get your mind back before you can look into it.


Rena @RenaKafizas
@Rubywax #AskRuby why do you think some people get Dementia?

If I knew that I’d be worth billions.  It’s Russian roulette which disease each of us get landed with; it could be genes, could be lifestyle but if you’re not using your brain in novel ways; you’re not helping your odds.



lifebeginsat59 @lifebeginsat59
@Rubywax do you do Pilates? #AskRuby

You probably noticed I have a particularly strong pelvic floor; bits of flooring are always stuck to me so, yes, I do Pilates.  It’s mindfulness and exercise together so you kill two birds with one stone; a clearer mind and a tighter bum.



#Twiteratatas @zakmckrakken
@Rubywax How do you get through the worst of days? The days when the darkness is without end? #needhelp #AskRuby 

Don’t whip yourself when you’re that low, watch box sets to stop the endless rumination; it won’t get you anywhere and only hammers you into the ground.  Do whatever you have to do to get your attention away from your thoughts because those are what’s sick; not you.



CoachBright @CoachBrightUK
#AskRuby What's the best way to talk about mental health in schools?

Find a teacher who suffers from it (it won’t be hard, there are probably more than 1 out of 3) and have them tell the kids their experiences. If one person is brave enough to speak out the rest will follow and that’s how teachers should teach - by example.



Becky Lavery @rlavery7
@Rubywax what's the best way to explain depression to the people you love #AskRuby

Repeat to them daily, “It has nothing to do with you.”  Once they understand it’s not their fault you can start to walk them through the feelings of nothingness/self –loathing/helplessness or whatever your particular symptoms are. They want to know but they want to know it’s not because of them.



David J Britton @Tyburn_Cross
@Rubywax Did you originally want a career as an actress rather than comedienne (hence the Professionals gig)? #AskRuby

Sadly, I thought I could act. Luckily, Alan Rickman informed me I would not have a future as an actress and to get off the stage immediately. Also luckily, he told me to write my own material and then taught me how to do comedy. I owe him.



Michael Khalsa @MichaelKhalsa
@Rubywax Ruby, what do you do if people give you shite? #AskRuby

I have to try with all my might, to hold back my instinct to rip their throats out.  Usually if I give the grief back I get a backwash of toxicity that makes me feel sick the next day so now I think why should I give them the pleasure?



Louis @kingof__fools
@Rubywax Musician Prof Green spoke 2day about depression & therapy, you've made it an acceptable thing now, How is new book coming? #askruby

My new book has left the Mothership (me) and comes out in the beginning of January. I wrote it to answer all the questions I get asked when doing my show: What can teen-agers do to deal with pressure? How can parents help their kids/babies? How can you cope in a world of distractions and incoming anxiety? How can you survive work? I cover a wide range of what makes us nuts and what we can do about it.  I’m still using the language of comedy.



Jane Brueton @BruetonJane
@Rubywax #AskRuby Do you think the pressure on women to look beautiful, be thin and super successful adds to mental health problems? X

Pressure to be perfect causes stress but if you have a disease like bi-polar, schizophrenia, depression etc. you could be a supermodel or the richest bitch on earth and still have all of the above.


Isabel Feiras @IFeiras
@Rubywax #AskRuby Why does it often seem that being well is a state of remission from illness?

When your broken leg heals or your flu leaves the building, you know you’re well again. With mental illness when it leaves its’ always lurks in the shadows ready to pounce again so you can never feel totally at ease. Being well always feels a bit temporary to me.



mox56 @mox56
#AskRuby Your thoughts re new studies indicating mindfulness can make it difficult to decide if experiences are real or only imagined.

Mindfulness gives you a way of dealing with the critical thoughts that make you stressed and or depressed. It works like a type of braking system so you don’t get sucked into rumination. It has nothing to do with deciding if experiences are real or imagined.  If you’re thinking those thoughts, please see a doctor.



Kallum Edwards @kallum_edwards
@Rubywax when are you writing another book? #AskRuby

I’ve just finished my new book, coming out in January. I can’t push it enough so I am…..endlessly. It’s called, “Mindfulness Guide For The Frazzled.”  You can pre-order it. (I’m still pushing).



Talking Therapies @TTBerkshire
What's one of the most helpful pieces of advice anyone's ever given you? #AskRuby

I love the expression, “Pain is pain but suffering is optional.”



Fiona Beddow @FionaBeddow
@Rubywax #AskRuby  What do you do to stay mindful/in the moment when you're on a train?

Just for a few minutes, I try to send all my attention to the sounds coming in from all sides and when I notice my mind starts it’s usual worrying, planning, rehashing again, I take the focus back to the sound. If you really tune into it, it’s actually fantastically entertaining, much better than earphones.



Alpa @alparina
@Rubywax any tips on how to stop my mind from drifting to other things? #AskRuby

Your mind is supposed to drift to other things; that’s its job. If it didn’t flit around, you’d be as useful as a lamppost. It’s not about stopping your thoughts but of not getting caught in their demands; watching them rather than reacting to them.



Lee Rowlands @SaladDodgersBBQ
@Rubywax Do autistic brains benefit from mindfulness in the same way? #AskRuby

I only know the effects of mindfulness by the scientific research done on it. I haven’t looked at how it benefits autistic brains but there would be papers out there; compliments of Google.



Dave West @foresthoop
@Rubywax Do you miss the USA? #AskRuby

No. I don’t like irony-free zones.



Julie Hollings @PRcommscoach
Your top tip for maintaining positivity in the face of setbacks?  #askruby

Find a friend who will listen and empathize; you can’t face things alone.



Jodie Leigh @JodieLeigh_ESXM
@Rubywax Thoughts on the link between nutrition & mental health? #AskRuby

Food isn’t my area of expertise – I only eat it.



James Williams @FamilyFeelings
Hi @Rubywax #askruby I start my journey to become a counsellor very soon what is the most effective therapy you have encountered thanks :)

 I studied mindfulness-based cognitive therapy but we all have different fingerprints, what works for one person, makes the next one climb the walls.  Ask yourself, what works for you?