Donald and Thurma – Part 4
“I think I can,” he said to himself, chugging along the sidewalk tracks. “I think I can.”
Donald power-walked along the sidewalk, determined to make something happen with Thurma, the nerd-pretty brunette he had met at the bar.
* *
“No, Oh God, shit, this isn’t happening.” said Thurma.
“What?” said Amanda.
“That guy I’m into is coming to talk to me.”
“That’s bad?”
“Rather kill myself.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m into him! What part of this don’t you understand?”
Amanda rolled her eyes, then squeezed her friend’s shoulder. “Just remember what I told you earlier – act like a bitch. Guys want that.”
“What if he tries to leave?”
“Don’t let him.”
* *
Donald met up with Thurma and Amanda, brimming with a big, dumb grin.
“Waddup, hey I just realized I never got to introduce-”
Thurma reached out, but when Donald tried to shake her hand she pulled away.
“Five dollars,” she said. “Else no handshake. Got the goods?”
“Huh?”
“What’s you’re name? I bet it’s stupid.”
“My name’s Donald.”
“That’s stupid.”
“Ok… What’s your name?”
“Go away.”
Donald shook his head, then turned around and started walking in the other direction. He stopped when Thurma grabbed him by the elbow and whirled him around.
“Kidding! My name’s Thurma.”
“Then why did you say ‘go away’?”
“‘Cause that’s what I want you to do.”
Donald stood facing Thurma directly. She reached into her purse, whipped out a stick of gum, then chewed it like a horse with peanut butter gums.
Donald’s phone beeped. He slid it out from his pocket and opened the text from Freddy –
Be a 8—–> if you want ( . )( . )!!! … also, send pictures.
Donald put his phone back in his pocket.
“What you still doin’ here… punk,” she said.
“You grabbed me when I turned to leave.”
“No I didn’t. That was Amanda.”
“Yea,” said Amanda. “What are you gonna do about, huh?”
“Go running to your mommy?” said Thurma.
“Qwy like a little baby?” added Amanda.
“Suck dick like some ratchety ass skank?” said Thurma.
Amanda turned to her friend. “Whoa.”
“What?” said Thurma. “Too much?”
Donald winced his eyes closed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Everything you just said is whack. I think you know that though, no shot you two are stupid enough to think white girl gangs are a thing-”
“90210-” began Thurma.
“They’re not,” said Donald. “But that’s not why I’m pissed.” He pointed at Thurma directly. “I came over to talk to you, because I’m into you, and I swear my intuitive compass either broke or you’re into me, too. No, you what I think? You’ve got something to lose here, that’s why you’re putting on this bull-shit charade.”
Thurma started forward, but Amanda grabbed the back of her dress. Thurma pushed her friend away, then stood face to face with Donald.
“What could I have to lose with you? You’re just another asshole who I don’t want to meet, that’s all!”
“What makes you think I’m an asshole? Maybe I’m the nicest guy you ever met. Maybe I’m the best thing to ever happen to you.”
Thurma rocked her head back and cackled at the clouds. She returned to Donald with a hand on his shoulder and a huge grin on her face. “Please. I have zits that will leave a bigger impact on me.”
“Take your fucking hand off me.”
Thurma rolled her eyes, then did.
“You give me the chance, I’ll prove it to you.”
“What? You got the goods? You’re the man of my dreams?” She looked Donald up and down, then covered her mouth and laughed.
“I am not the man of your dreams.”
“Obviously, I was joking-”
“Try your new reality.”
Thurma laughed. “Never heard that line before. Fine, maybe I’ll let you take me out to dinner sometime-”
“Right now.”
“What?”
“Seafood place on the pier, it’s in walking distance. You and I, now or never,” Donald said, holding his hand out to her.
Thurma shook her head, then took out her phone. Her hand shook as she brushed a hair back. “Here, ok, uh, just put your number-”
“No phones, no numbers.”
She turned around for help from Amanda.
“Sorry, but we’re together tonight,” Amanda said, tugging Thurma back and into herself.
Donald nodded, then began walking away.
“Just give her your number and I swear she’ll go out with you!” Amanda yelled.
Donald turned around slowly, then stared in silence for a moment at the two girls who were suddenly so still.
“My number is 1, and that’s how long my offer stays good for.”
Donald returned to his elevated pace toward Freddy, had the escalade running in the parking lot. He kept his head held high as he strolled, even though it gradually dawned on him that not a word of what he had last said made any coherent sense whatsoever. His heart was still racing and he didn’t get what he’d hoped for, but for the first time in a while, he felt good about finally standing up for himself.
“Wait!”
Donald turned around.
Running after him like a frantic mess was Thurma. She suddenly stopped cold, and held her purse by the strap with both hands.
“I’ll go out with you… Now’s fine.”
To be continued…
Thomas M. Watt
