Promises for the New School Year

A new school year is knocking at the door to my last week of summer. Monday will bring mimosas and tissues as I both cheer and cry while sending my littles off to a new year. Paperwork will flood my home by Tuesday, Wednesday will reveal the bags under my eyes from the new early wake-up routine, and by Friday I will miss my children so much that I will contemplate the ultimate level of stay-at-home-mom dedication—— homeschool! 
As September grabs ahold of us, routine will have settled onto our new semester. Fall will somehow be in the air even with 90 degree temps and mosquitoes swarming. Halloween will be on the brain and to summon the cooler weather everyone on my block, myself included, will be decorating with pumpkins, spiking their lawns with harvest Round Top metal decor, and lighting every spice candle within reach. 
The idea of homeschooling my children will wane as the stress and reality of the household, motherhood and volunteering responsibilities reverberate into my consciousness in my sleep and into my waking hours. 
It is there—there in the dark side of the school routine—where I want to promise myself this year will be different. . .


1. I promise not to over volunteer. YES, I want to help. Yes, it is important to give back to your neighborhood school, your children’s school, to the teachers, etc., but I promise not to lose sight of the forest for the trees. Simply put, I cannot become too busy, stressed and overwhelmed volunteering for everyone and every organization that I’m too stressed and too busy to have quality time with my own children—- time that is, let’s face it, very sparse during the school year and very fleeting as they age. 
Instead, I will say no when saying yes comes at the expense of my own family--for after all I am a mother so I can mother. 
2. I promise not to feel guilty for my first promise. 
3. I promise to let my children be children.I won’t over schedule them with after school and weekend activities. I will hush the suburbanite fear mongering that ignites the paranoia within that our children will end up drop-out, drug addicted prostitutes living on the streets if we don’t fill every waking after school hour until bedtime with sports, lessons and olympic dreams. 
Instead, I promise to breathe… to slow down… to enjoy an after school cupcake outing so I can visit with my children and really hear their thoughts, feelings, dreams, worries. I promise to let them play, to read for pleasure , to lounge on a Saturday morning. They have their entire lives to be over scheduled, stressed, and left chasing…. chasing the unobtainable happiness and success that never comes from anywhere but from within. I promise to let them be little, and I promise I will free myself of worry of whom they will become as adults because I know I gave them the precious time they needed— the time that childhood allows, if I only allow my children to take it. 
4. I promise my own self-worth. I promise that I will balance my life while they are in school so that when they are home, I am the best parent I can be. I promise to utilize the time they are in school to de-stress, to manage the household, to volunteer, to work— all so I am fresh and present for them. The weeknight hours we have together are disappointingly short during the school year— much too short to spend those hours feeling overwhelmed, stressed or unavailable because I couldn’t keep promises #1-3


5. I promise to have fun!Whether in car line, a volunteer meeting or schlepping kids to activities; I promise to keep a light heart and the spirit of summer. I promise to remember these days are precious, and before long I will be crying at my daughter's dorm room as we drop her off at college. I promise to enjoy more than dread the madness of the school year because some day I will find myself missing it (if only for a moment). 
6. I promise to 'Keep Calm' (& to not lose my shit) during homework timeI promise to channel my inner peace when my daughter and myself become overwhelmed and frustrated with homework or a school project-- and to remember promises #3-5. 
7. I promise to stay socialI promise to stay social and ignore the desire to hibernate in reclusion for survival. The busy school year can easily have me retreating into my shell. Maybe it is the introvert in me or a coping mechanism for stress (or a little of both), but it's often easier for me to run outside of social circles throughout the months of the school year. I promise this year, however, to have dinner parties, grab a coffee (or drinks) with friends, throw a party, host a playdate, and get together with friends and their families on the weekends. I promise this for my children, mostly. I want them to see a balanced life with healthy relationships and to feel the joy, lessons & expanding viewpoints we can share from the company of others. 
8. I promise to be aloneLastly and while seemingly contradictory to promise #7, I would like to indulge in complete alone time . As my youngest goes off to preschool for the first time, I will find myself with a few hours a week of utter aloneness (a first in years). I promise to take a couple of these hours each week to be by myself-- to pray, to mediate, to learn, to read, to write, to sit alone in a coffee shop. As much as I will miss my children while they are in school, this rare alone time will be my gift of renewal and growth -- as long as I promise myself to take it. 
Happy New School Year! What promises will you make?