Dear Parent Sending Your Firstborn Off To College

Dear Parent Sending Your Firstborn Off To College,

I recognize you.

I see you lying awake long after everyone else in your house is asleep because that’s when the panic grips you the tightest.

I hear the speeches you give yourself that contain phrases like, “it seems like just yesterday,” “how is this possible?” and “nope, never gonna happen.”

I see the secret calendar you are keeping that has all the possible dates throughout the year penciled in—in Sharpie—of when you’ll potentially get to...