Daily Dialogue: Cauldron of Malice – Chapter Five
Agatha
You’ve stated that out of the 14 people you’ve asked for help, you’ve not left one alive.
Catherine
That’s correct.
Agatha
Did you mean to give them purchase?
Catherine
Meaning that my intention was to kill? No, dear Agatha, like I told you: I killed them when their uselessness became supreme.
Agatha
But was that always meant to be their end? Did you always mean to end them when they didn’t matter to you?
Catherine
Oh. No.
Agatha
Why kill them, then?
Catherine
It began as an accident, then accident became ritual.
Agatha
When did the colors fade into one another?
Catherine
The fourth would-be helper.
Agatha
Why do you feel the need to incorporate your lovers into your life?
Catherine
My, you’re a little jitterbug, aren’t you?
Agatha
Consider it shock therapy. Volleying many inquiries that don’t flow into one another keeps your replies unprepared. And more true.
Catherine
I do adore your rationale. Why, why, why… Do you involve your husband in your affairs?
Agatha
I don’t have a choice. Marriage, sadly, tears down walls of privacy and seclusion. But don’t think that I wouldn’t leave him unawares if the opportunity ever presented itself.
Catherine
I see. Maybe because the ideal relationship, in my mind, is one where both parties share everything.
Agatha
Have they ever offered to share first?
Catherine
No, I believe not.
Agatha
Have they ever shared more than you?
Catherine
I was always more the cornucopia.
Agatha
Have you ever killed a companion?
Catherine
No, that would be worse than death for me.
Agatha
Yet you have no issue with murdering those whom you choose to help you through your pain.
Catherine
Because they’ve failed me, and I detest failure.
Agatha
Do you consider your past relationships failures?
Catherine
No, of course not.
Agatha
Then what do you consider them to be?
Catherine
I… I… don’t… know.
Agatha
Was your first helper a kidnapping victim?
Catherine
They all were.
Agatha
What was the first like?
Catherine
Whitney was–
Agatha
Whitney was a woman?
Catherine
Yes.
Agatha
Were they all?
Catherine
Why would I go to a man about matters of pained femininity? Whitney was what you would call a frequent bar patron.
Agatha
A libations expert.
Catherine
Heh, quite. One late night, or early morning, whichever statement suits you, she happened to have found her way into my carriage.
Agatha
Those pesky carriages always manage to find gudgeons.
Catherine
Indeed. When she was a bit more clear-headed, I told her what I wanted from her. She wouldn’t hear of it, though. She kept clamoring on about wanting to be let go and wanting more spirits. On and on. The final straw was her releasing her bowels on the marble floor. I had no choice but to… deal with her, so I did.
Agatha
How did you deal with her?
Catherine
I was angry, you see, because I wanted things to go well. Because of that, I might have gone a bit too far. In any case, she was the same consistency of her shit when I was finished with her.
Agatha
You could have let her go.
Catherine
And have her tell the world that she set foot in my establishment? Pish-posh, dear Agatha. Pish-posh and hornswallow.
Agatha
Do you ever think you’ll love again?
Catherine
I’m acutely aware that I will. Which is why I desire your help to change my dependent ways.
Agatha
How bad did it get? Your dependence on others?
Catherine
I almost lost my life.
Agatha
Why?
Catherine
Because when they left me, I found that there was more of them in me than me. Do you know what that’s like?
Agatha
No, and, begging your pardon, I would like not to ever know.
Catherine
When there is so little of you left, one wonders why to bother existing.
Agatha
Have you ever participated in self-mutilation?
Catherine
I… think that’s a question best left for later.
