Something To Remember When Social Media Makes You Feel Bad About Yourself

I’m not what you would call a social media pro. I am to all things social media what a flip phone is to an iPhone.

While I do have a Facebook account, I rarely look at it. My colleagues at my office check it and tell me if there is something I need to know. I tweet once every six weeks or so, whether I need to or not.

C.S. Lewis and several other dead writers follow me, which I don’t understand, but am nonetheless honored. I also have Instagram, but I had a lull in activity and now I can’t figure out how to get back on.

As I said, I’m not a pro.

Truth be told, one of the reasons I’m not very active is that social media makes me both insecure and envious. At age 61, those words are a little embarrassing to write, but they’re true.

After spending a few minutes looking at all of the cool things people are doing, I begin to sink. While I’m clearing the muck out of my gutters or getting my oil changed, they are a few feet from Bono at a concert. (It’s amazing how many people get a few feet from Bono!)

One Instagrammer I follow has been at a different idyllic lake in the Northwest every day for the last 6 months.

I don’t think she ever goes inside.

There are photos and movies of people jumping into the water, sharing drinks at some pub, or eating dinner around a large table. Some share an image of a latte with those designs in the top with a journal next to it.

Daily, I see the most beautiful sunsets and sunrises over the beach, and selfies in exotic places around the world.

Sometimes these beautiful scenes and moments are interrupted by some curmudgeon ranting about something, but soon they are pushed into the background by the exciting and fun people.

This is where envy comes in.

Other people live such amazing and interesting lives. I wish my life looked like theirs. And sometimes, I simply wish I would have been invited to the party.

It’s easy to feel like you’re on the outside of the good life when you’re looking at social media.

Not long ago, I read a blog by a woman who was a Mommy Blogger.

She wrote about her experience raising three children. While many such bloggers write about amazing and creative ways to raise great kids, she posted a photo of the inside of the back seat of her car.

There were banana peels, crushed Goldfish, discarded juice boxes, Starbucks cups, and McDonald’s hamburger wrappers.

It was a mess and I loved her for it.

It made me realize that maybe there were more people around like me.

It reminded me of a phrase from Eugene Peterson. He wrote an essay about the “Blue Mountain” people. When you are driving toward the mountains, from a distance they appear to be blue. But the closer you get to them, the more you realize that mountains aren’t blue at all.

People are like that, he says.

From the distance of Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, many people appear to be a certain fantastic way. But if you get close, they’re just like you and me.

Five percent of the time, they’re in the midst of nature, at a U2 concert, at Disney World or having great parties. But the other 95% of the time, they’re simply living life. And a lot of that life is mundane.

There is always someone who appears to be living the life I wish I had. But more and more, a simple reality comes into view.

All of us are the same color.

And that color is not blue.