Contention Deficit Disorder

It is hard to explain the sheer bliss of knowing that every book of mine that was published in 2010 is totally free of even the slightest chance of winning any sort of award. I'm happily out of contention. Don't get me wrong -- I love awards and recognition. I covet circular seals of gold. I crave validation and inhale even the faintest whiff of praise that drifts my way. It's not a hypothetical lust. I've tasted the fringes of glory. I've received some wonderful state awards, and had several of my books on BBYA, Quick Picks, or other prestigious lists. But whenever one of my books had any sort of chance of getting a major award, or making an important national list, I spent far too much time waiting for the announcements. I've actually checked the schedules of ALA committee meetings to try to figure out when they'll be finished with their discussion and ready to release their lists. That's pathetic. And, as much as I recognize this behavior as a character flaw, I'm sure the next time I have a book that I feel is a contender, I'll fall back into my old habits. But, for now, I am blissfully detached. There have been years when I didn't have a book out. That brings its own sort of peace. But this is even better. I love drifting beneath the level of consideration. I love not trying to calculate what time the phone might ring, or repeatedly refreshing the web page for the major lists to see if the results have been posted. Though, if you're in contention for something, I hope you win. I really do.