When characters rebel!

Some people just don’t get it. Trying to explain that my characters are not listening to me, that they’re behaving badly, and that they’re not doing what I tell them to, to people who are not authors? The answer is always the same:

“Uh … you do realise YOU have complete control, right? THEY’RE IN YOUR HEAD.”

At which point, I shake my head and scream at them, “You have no idea!” This tends to make strangers run the other way as fast as they can, but my friends and family just roll their eyes...