Perhaps You Can't Hear Me Over The Sound Of My Eyes Rolling

The Chicago Tribune posted my new column. You can read it here. Let's just say this column has not been embraced by some readers who, if hurling personal insults is any indication, most likely received copies of Rules for Radicals for Christmas. Seriously, check out the comments section; it's priceless. I love the person who says I'm an "irresponsible journalist." That may go on my business card. Anyway, for my fans, hope you enjoy the piece. I had fun writing it. For you nay-sayers who've come here to find my email address to berate me for being stupid, naive, or simply a terrible American who in no way speaks for you, I invite you to do better. No, really. Please, write your own take on this subject. Here are the rules: First, remember this is a humor column, not a news story. Facts take a backseat to funny. Make the topic of leaking classified documents both accessible and relatable to all newspaper readers both in print and online, including everyone in each demographic from soccer moms to retirees. Personalize said topic of leaking classified documents, bringing in examples from your own life. Then, using creative word-play, express your thoughts in such a way that has the potential to inspire anyone who isn't completely devoid of a sense of humor to crack a smile over a plate of waffles while reading at the breakfast table. Of course, you'll want to use short sentences and please save your SAT words for Lexulous....