Favourite hobbies include (not necessarily in order): Conservative baitingPretending I don’t speak...

Favourite hobbies include (not necessarily in order): 

Conservative baiting
Pretending I don’t speak English to annoying tourists
Playing mind games with myself
Playing mind games with a man who has no idea what he’s gotten himself into but is starting to (mwahaha!)
Talking to myself
Hating on Mary Morstan (seriously, it’s just so cathartic and relaxing!)
Experimenting with different methods of pizza ordering in French
Calculating how far I’ve walked every day
Ogling other people’s Vespas (this is a new addition to the list)
Planning world domination, just for fun
Obsessively keeping nightly statistic reports of my own fanworkPainting my nails
Juggling as many balls (metaphorical, although…) as possible
Making potato leek soup
Writing Johnlock fanfic
Playing on Paint for my own amusement
Making fridge poetry that no one ever sees, since I live alone and never have anyone over :’(Befriending random old men on the busFeminist rantsAnti-heteronormativity rantsStephen Harper rantsRants in general, in factInventing recipesLike this one: get half a pint of raspberries, freeze them, then thaw them just a little bit (I guess you could just freeze them slightly less, but you do what you do), put them in a bowl or something, add some sparkling water, fresh lime juice, a small bottle of gin, and lots of sugar. Blend it with an immersion blender. Or I guess if you’re fancier than me and actually own a real blender, you could put the whole shebang in there. Pour into a glass and drink. Will be seedy, but hey, so are you.Making stupid text posts late at night when I have to teach early in the morningBefriending other people’s pets. Inventing weird saladsPlaying the Song of Ice & Fire category on Quiz Up and ignoring the creepers that try to pick me upMaking angry facebook posts about stupid people I see at the pool. Today’s was about people who swim with hand paddles on just so that they can be in the fast lane. My local pool divides lanes by speed, and there’s always some asshole with the paddles in the fast lane, and they invariably don’t know how to rotate their shoulders properly, which means that at some point they whack you in the face while you’re swimming on the other side of the lane or in the medium lane on the other side of the rope, the hard edge of the plastic practically slicing your face open in the water because said jackass has no idea how to swim and should therefore be in the slow lane with the octogenarians and their flutter boards and the other newbies who are floundering slowly from one end of the pool to the other. Seriously: if you’re only able to swim in the fast lane because you’ve got paddles on your hands and flippers on your feet, everyone knows you’re a fast lane fraud, anyway. Just spare everyone’s faces the harm, ok? Ugh. 

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