Dating Fails and the Release of "Misery and Marlene"
Below are two actual individuals I had the pleasure of seeing on Tinder. It's a wonder I'm still single. 
Hello my humble readers. It is I, your single 26-year-old author/editor friend Ashley.
To celebrate the release of my contemporary novella, "Misery and Marlene," I wanted to post about the perils of dating as a young woman in this technological age.
It applies somewhat to my novella--in it, Marlene is a 25-year-old living an unhappy (nay, "miserable?") life in Fenton, Missouri, and she is involved with a really sweet but BORING guy named Seth. They met at the restaurant where Marlene works as a waitress, and Seth represents many things that Marlene thinks she wants to escape: a complacent life of domesticity, a passionless marriage with someone who's safe and "reliable," a boring existence.
Marlene is terrified of two things:
that her life will never mean anything,
AND
that someone will hurt her by leaving first.
I wonder sometimes if these are some of the reasons why guys (and girls) act so oddly regarding online dating (or any dating, for that matter). Do we use defense mechanisms like bravado (*cough* both pictures at the top *cough*), humor and overconfidence to put off the truth--that many times, we are on there because we feeling an emptiness in our lives, one that a significant other could fill?
I like to tell myself that's why. It makes things easier (and less depressing) to imagine some of the sexist, ridiculous and downright degrading things men have said to me and my fellow single women more tolerable (albeit barely); to believe that they're doing it so they don't get hurt. Because I can understand that. Hell, I wrote an anti-heroine named Marlene who does EXACTLY that.
And although I can understand that we're all in this awkward, vulnerable boat together, it doesn't mean I'm not going to let you off the hook for acting like a fool. For treating me or my fellow single gals like we're stupid, a piece of meat, someone to occupy your time with for an evening, someone to USE. And believe me when I say that we KNOW when you're doing that. Maybe not right away, and maybe we don't all post about it ... but we know.
It doesn't take that much to stay out of the "Dating Fail" category. Be pleasant, be polite, be a gentleman. Please don't cry on a first date. Please don't ask us to pay for our half if you invited us out. Please don't make us smell videogames unless we've made it abundantly CLEAR that we like the smell of plastic.
Watch the video below and you'll know what I'm talking about, and give " Misery and Marlene " a read if you like adult contemporary, complete with a naughty sex scene or two. ;)
Next up is "The Charismatics 2," and more dating videos! (Unless I meet my Prince Charming this weekend ...) Fingers crossed. And remember my friends ...
Never stop writing and never stop dreaming!
Hello my humble readers. It is I, your single 26-year-old author/editor friend Ashley. To celebrate the release of my contemporary novella, "Misery and Marlene," I wanted to post about the perils of dating as a young woman in this technological age.
It applies somewhat to my novella--in it, Marlene is a 25-year-old living an unhappy (nay, "miserable?") life in Fenton, Missouri, and she is involved with a really sweet but BORING guy named Seth. They met at the restaurant where Marlene works as a waitress, and Seth represents many things that Marlene thinks she wants to escape: a complacent life of domesticity, a passionless marriage with someone who's safe and "reliable," a boring existence.
Marlene is terrified of two things:
that her life will never mean anything,
AND
that someone will hurt her by leaving first.
I wonder sometimes if these are some of the reasons why guys (and girls) act so oddly regarding online dating (or any dating, for that matter). Do we use defense mechanisms like bravado (*cough* both pictures at the top *cough*), humor and overconfidence to put off the truth--that many times, we are on there because we feeling an emptiness in our lives, one that a significant other could fill?
I like to tell myself that's why. It makes things easier (and less depressing) to imagine some of the sexist, ridiculous and downright degrading things men have said to me and my fellow single women more tolerable (albeit barely); to believe that they're doing it so they don't get hurt. Because I can understand that. Hell, I wrote an anti-heroine named Marlene who does EXACTLY that.
And although I can understand that we're all in this awkward, vulnerable boat together, it doesn't mean I'm not going to let you off the hook for acting like a fool. For treating me or my fellow single gals like we're stupid, a piece of meat, someone to occupy your time with for an evening, someone to USE. And believe me when I say that we KNOW when you're doing that. Maybe not right away, and maybe we don't all post about it ... but we know.
It doesn't take that much to stay out of the "Dating Fail" category. Be pleasant, be polite, be a gentleman. Please don't cry on a first date. Please don't ask us to pay for our half if you invited us out. Please don't make us smell videogames unless we've made it abundantly CLEAR that we like the smell of plastic.
Watch the video below and you'll know what I'm talking about, and give " Misery and Marlene " a read if you like adult contemporary, complete with a naughty sex scene or two. ;)
Next up is "The Charismatics 2," and more dating videos! (Unless I meet my Prince Charming this weekend ...) Fingers crossed. And remember my friends ...
Never stop writing and never stop dreaming!
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