Bulletins From The Garlic

Oprah Shocker: “I’m Really A White Man”
Golden State Warriors Win NBA Title, Announce Group Marriage, Take Guinness Award As Largest Tallest Married Same Sex Couples
Republican National Committee Dubs Trump “His Ass-Holiness”
Democratic National Committee Calls Him “Party Poper” but Promises Support For “His Ass-Holiness” If He Wins Election
Entire SNL Cast Enters Republican Primary: “We’re at least as funny as they are”
Other Republican Candidates Say, “ Really? Oprah Is A White Guy?”
Caitlyn Jenner To Become African American, Rachel Dolezal to become a man, Kardashian family invites all four as guests on surreality show coming to Channel Zero.
Stay Tuned for really important Bulletins you won’t find anywhere else.