The "What?!" Series
Please make sure you read all the way to the end. It's definitely worth your time. Not as bad as the raw chicken story, but the same sort of thing.
-Me: Look, there's a moth in the corner.
Trooper: Ooh, can I touch it?
Me: Sure, you can try.
Trooper: Can I eat it?
Me: What?!
-A library book sparked a conversation about slavery in the U.S., and as I did my best to explain things on a four-year-old level, Trooper seemed to experience an appropriate amount of incredulity. He asked questions like, 'Why white people kidnap black people?' and 'Why they make them work?' When I thought he was grasping it all as well as he could at his current level of development, he asked, "What about me?"
Well if that isn't a heartbreaking question, I don't think there is one. I answered, "No, not you, honey. That was a long time ago." Of course, five years ago was a long time ago to him, so that was a pretty vague answer, but it was the best I could come up with on the fly.
He said, "Oh. What about Santa Claus?"
"What?!"
-I came in from my morning walk and Jonathan was standing over last night's oily frying pan, pointing at it while he gave me a 'look-what-your-son-did' look.
"What?"
He lifted the pan so I could see the Noise Putty that had been 'frying'.
"What?!"
-Our friend, Jenn, was over for lunch, and while I was getting stuff from the kitchen and she was in the bathroom, Trooper apparently raided her purse. On her way back from the bathroom, she told me that she had found something of hers in the hallway, right about the same time Trooper came to me and asked if I would wash his glasses. It turned out that Trooper had taken a wide, fat chapstick and smeared it over his lenses.
"What?!"
But that's not the end of the story. Later, after Jenn had gone, Trooper told me what else he had done with the chapstick. It went something like this, "Mommy, I put Miss Jenn's deodorant on like this," as he mimed rolling a deodorant stick under his arm. "And I put it on my face. It was spicy."
"WHAT?!!!!"
-Me: Look, there's a moth in the corner.
Trooper: Ooh, can I touch it?
Me: Sure, you can try.
Trooper: Can I eat it?
Me: What?!
-A library book sparked a conversation about slavery in the U.S., and as I did my best to explain things on a four-year-old level, Trooper seemed to experience an appropriate amount of incredulity. He asked questions like, 'Why white people kidnap black people?' and 'Why they make them work?' When I thought he was grasping it all as well as he could at his current level of development, he asked, "What about me?"
Well if that isn't a heartbreaking question, I don't think there is one. I answered, "No, not you, honey. That was a long time ago." Of course, five years ago was a long time ago to him, so that was a pretty vague answer, but it was the best I could come up with on the fly.
He said, "Oh. What about Santa Claus?"
"What?!"
-I came in from my morning walk and Jonathan was standing over last night's oily frying pan, pointing at it while he gave me a 'look-what-your-son-did' look.
"What?"
He lifted the pan so I could see the Noise Putty that had been 'frying'.
"What?!"
-Our friend, Jenn, was over for lunch, and while I was getting stuff from the kitchen and she was in the bathroom, Trooper apparently raided her purse. On her way back from the bathroom, she told me that she had found something of hers in the hallway, right about the same time Trooper came to me and asked if I would wash his glasses. It turned out that Trooper had taken a wide, fat chapstick and smeared it over his lenses.
"What?!"
But that's not the end of the story. Later, after Jenn had gone, Trooper told me what else he had done with the chapstick. It went something like this, "Mommy, I put Miss Jenn's deodorant on like this," as he mimed rolling a deodorant stick under his arm. "And I put it on my face. It was spicy."
"WHAT?!!!!"
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