Relax

I’ve been out of the world of TV production for over two years now and the thing I find most surprising is how much I still do. I had fully expected when I left that job, which ate a lot of my life, that I’d be lost… purposeless… adrift. It didn’t happen. I do have more time on my hands but I’ve learned how to relax into that time.

When you have a career, kids, a busy life, it’s sometimes easy to forget that relaxing is an important part of staying healthy. If you have parents who are getting on and they’re part of your responsibility, if you’ve added school to your plate, if you’re trying to meet the expectations of all the people around you, relaxing can seem like a waste of time.

Who has time to relax? Seriously? If you think you need another four or five hours in your day just to come out even, the answer is YOU.

If you allow the hum and buzz of your life to deplete you, its only a matter of time before — frayed to the thinnest of strips — you fizzle right out. Relaxing is the only way to re-energize, so you better find a way to work it into your life if you want to remain the rock you are for all those people counting on you.

You could read a book. You could meditate. You could take a stroll, sit and pray, write in your journal or listen to some music. Relaxing doesn’t require that you set aside gobs of time. It does require that you be committed to chilling out without interruption. So ignore the phone, put away the electronic devices, and be unreachable for just a little while. You want to give yourself enough time to come down off the buzz that hums in the wire of your constant activity.

Stretched taunt? Can’t imagine where you’d find the time? That’s because you haven’t really tried. So convinced are you that the world will stop revolving without your hands-on attention that you won’t even give it a go.

Give it a go. Light a candle and take a bath. Turn on some music and flip through the family photo albums. Knit, paint, sing. Whatever fills you with a sense of peace, do it.

If you grew up in a family where sitting still was frowned upon, where the idea of doing nothing was considered ridiculous, you’ll have to retrain yourself to think of relaxation as your right, not an indulgence. You have to stop seeing the twenty minutes you take for yourself as time stolen from chores you should be doing. You have to give yourself permission to take great pleasure in doing something just for you. The ultimate in relaxation is to do absolutely nothing. To just sit and observe the world, without passing judgement, without wondering what you’re missing or what’s missing you.

One of the big lessons I had to learn because I worked from home was how to not respond when it was Me Time. If I’m eating a meal or watching a favourite show on television and the phone rings, I don’t answer it. I am enjoying being with me, I don’t want to be interrupted. They’ll leave a message or call back. The world won’t end.