I’m sorry

but I can’t take a woman seriously if she’s had her boobs enlarged. I mean, she could be talking about how Immanuel Kant says that we do not have a clear picture of reality. Everything we see, hear, touch, and taste is filtered, coming as it does into our knowledge through our sense organs. Even space and time are simply attributes we apply to the external world to make it graspable. The function of space is to break up reality into manageable chunks, which we call objects or “things”. Without space, we would be overwhelmed and would experience external reality all at once. Space, then, is merely a tool employed by our sense organs and is not something that exists outside of us. The same goes for time. Without time, we would experience external reality–the past reality, the present reality, and the future reality–all at once. It, too, is simply an “app” dividing reality up into pieces so that it can be experienced without confusion. Space and time are WITHIN, not without. There is a reality but it is unreachable to us in and of itself. Reality for us is merely a reflection, a shadow….a sensation.

And I’ll be all “Whatever, Toots.”

Call me sexist. I may very well be, and it may be a good thing I am posting this in the middle of the night (though I will leave it up for days because I am dark, off the internet, most of the week) but know that I can’t take a man in a toupee seriously either. The dipshit may as well be wearing a chinstrap.  In both cases, I can’t look at their eyes. In one, I’m looking down. In the other, up.

Vanity, thy name is “Toots”.