PLEASE HOLD, YOUR CALL IS IMPORTANT TO US. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

You already know where this is going, don't you?

I spent five, (5, cinqo, cinq) hours on the phone yesterday helping my mother with her monthly bills. Less than half was spent in a conversation with a human being. I learned a lot. Some of what I learned was useful, (did you know some customer service reps are still listening to you even though that annoying "on hold" music is playing? Oh, yeah . . . read on.) Most of that time felt as if I was in a CIA-sponsored psychiatric experiment to see if t