The Life-Changing Secret to Overcoming Your Greatest Fears

For the nine months leading to the birth of my twin daughters, Rosie and Dassi, I had two emotions.

One: Profound joy.
Two: Buck-naked fear. I had no idea how to be a dad, much less the father of daughters.

I was never good at relating to girls, so how could I deal with two more? I spent days playing street baseball, bow hunting and breaking stuff. In my hood, we shot bottle rockets and roman candles at each other. For fun. Now I was expected to talk about makeup, dresses and eventually … boys?

Yeah.

Raising girls didn’t feel so instinctive and primal.

It felt more like being the only guy trapped in a tea party, with those older women who wear big hats and feather boas. “No…no…no…” the tea ladies would correct me in their British accents. “You poor little man, that is terribly, wrong. Hold the teacup like this.”

How does a dude possibly fit in there?

Through all of this, there was a deep fear.

The fear had a lot to do with me not knowing how to be a dad. It was tangible. I’m sure it was related to those things that lived under my bed as a child. Creepers. Whenever I got out of bed in the night, I jumped.

The last thing I wanted was a Creeper to grab a’holt of an ankle. (Did anyone else do that?)

But then a surprising thing happened.

Photo Credit: Chris Price, Creative Commons

When Rosie and Dassi arrived, I held them and they needed me. They needed me. My fear was eclipsed by love and my resolve hardened. Technically, I still didn’t have a clue about being a dad—but it didn’t matter. Although we had just met, I’d gladly have a bloody knife fight with the devil to protect them.

I learned something that night.

I learned love gives us courage. Determination. Grit. There is a lot of talk today about overcoming fear. Most of it has to do with techniques and “bucking up and overcoming.” But here’s a little secret:

Love fuels our courage. Storyline Blog