Weekend Writing Warriors-Steampunk WIP Snippet 8

Welcome to the Weekend Writing Warriors, the perfect place to discover new authors and fall in love with their writing. Each Sunday we share 8 sentences from a current or finished manuscript. Click here for the rest of the amazing writers participating.

I’m continuing to share from my current work in progress FPWL. It’s a companion novel to Dirigibles Are Forever and hopefully the beginning of a trilogy. This snippet follows directly after last week’s, which ended with Clara asking Garrett if he knew how to handle her. We’re in his point of view and the punctuation is just a little creative because I wanted to give you the full exchange.

“He smiled and knew it carried an edge, “Would you like me to prove it?”

She studied him, leaving him hanging on the edge of the abyss.

“Give me the tour and I will let you know.”

Challenge curled through him-he gave her a light bow, but continued to hold her gaze captive. “Please step into my cargo hold.”

Her smile lit up her face-her beauty was not conventional, but in that moment it took away his breath.  “Said the spider to the fly.”

Garrett smiled, “Will you step into my web?”

She turned around and threw him a glance over her shoulder, “I haven’t made up my mind yet.”

What works, what doesn’t? I’m not sure about the last two lines.

Garrett’s comment about the cargo hold links back to Clara’s request for a tour that covers the areas passengers don’t usually get to see, including the cargo hold.

Have a wonderful Sunday and Happy Writing!