You Forget It’s Not Just You

I can very much sympathize with Joss Whedon’s recent abandonment of Twitter, and the astonishing spectacle of jerks letting loose on the creator of one of the greatest female heroines in fiction as being a misogynist hater of women. Why? Because they disliked his treatment of Black Widow in “Age of Ultron.” (Yes, Joss has since claimed that it was simply a time management thing, but that does nothing to explain or excuse his treatment.)

They didn’t allow for the notion that he was interested in trying a different angle on her. They didn’t allow for the fact of the actresses’ pregnancy perhaps requiring the curtailment of action sequences. Instead they resorted to snide comments and threats, as if he weren’t the creator of “Buffy” and “Dollhouse” and “Firefly,” all of which starred or featured strong women (remember River destroying the roomful of Reavers? How awesome was that?)

I can relate. It wasn’t all that long ago that I wrote a video game called “Shadow Complex” that was based on a book written by noted homophobe Orson Scott Card. My involvement resulted in angry fans denouncing me and declaring that all my work should be boycotted…at the exact same time that GLAAD was presenting me an award for my gay-friendly work on X-Factor.

Boycotts have more recently been suggested because I dared to point out that there is in fact a lot of merchandise out there for female fans. Two dozen Black Widow t-shirts on Amazon, action figures, all kinds of stuff. As much as for the heroes? No, definitely not. Should there be more? Of course, I said, but at least there’s * some *. That attitude got me tagged with the same epithets that were tossed at Whedon, although certainly not with the range and fury that he received. I couldn’t believe the comments thrown at someone by fans declaring that “Age of Ultron” had ruined everything from the Black Widow to their lives. How does a film ruin your life?

They say they come for discourse and to express ideas, but that’s only half true. They are interested in declaring their ideas. But they are not remotely interested in listening to any responses. They want to be heard but don’t want to hear anyone else beyond a reply of, “Gee, you’re right.” If you do dare to give an answer, however measured, they have various terms to be employed—“mansplaining,” “privilege” and the like—that gets wielded so that they can have an excuse to dismiss what you say out of hand. If you speak calmly, they attribute the nastiest voice to it possible. They will invent quotations for you and attack the quotations as if you said it. They speak in insulting and condescending manner and if you get fed up and respond in kind will then immediately condemn you for being insulting and condescending, never taking responsibility for the notion that they are the ones who instituted it.

Could a case be made that it was odd Natasha referred to herself as a monster because she had allowed them to sterilize her so she couldn’t have children? Yes, absolutely. It’s a decision that many women make and I’m sure they don’t see themselves as monstrous. But it’s certainly a point that could be made in calm, clinical manner rather than launching an all-out attack on the writer.

When the hell will these extremists realize that they are hurting themselves when they engage in this behavior? When will they understand that the way to get people to listen to them is with reasoned actions rather than name calling and declarations of boycotts? And when will more moderate voices—and there are some out there—understand that associating with these people is going to hurt their cause instead of helping them?

Hell, I know that posting this piece alone will result in more people declaring I should be boycotted. But sometimes you just have to say what’s on your mind and screw the consequences.

PAD