The Dog’s Bollocks

“Listen son, we’re on to a good thing here. Play your cards right and you’re on the gravy train for life.”
“Are you sure, Dad? She seems a bit grumpy, especially in the mornings.”
“When I was your age, I was lucky to get a cardboard box to live in, out in the back yard, and good food wasn’t easy to come by. I lived on scraps from the Master’s table, back then, and he was meaner than a bitch in heat.”
The puppy rolled his eyes. He’d heard these old stories before and didn’t believe a word of them.