The best account on Instagram and the lie we tell each day.

Yesterday, I handed my passport and ticket to a TSA agent at the airport.

I asked her how she was doing and with a chipper voice she said, “I’m wonderful, how are you?”

“I’m great!” I replied, “Look at us, you’re wonderful, I’m great, we must be having a good day.”

She looked at me out of the corner of her eyes and said, “I’m actually not wonderful. I’m lying, what about you?”

I didn’t know how to answer her.

In that moment, a stranger who I’d have a sliver of a conversation with took down the performance curtain and showed me what was really going on backstage at the play of her life and I couldn’t return the favor.

I stumbled through a handful of now forgotten words. Chances are I said something sarcastic as that’s the kind of wall I raise when put into a conversational corner.

“I’m lying, what about you?”

Dang TSA, you’re just supposed to make sure I don’t have too much peanut butter in my bag or a sword hidden in a cane.

That apparently happens a lot. If you’re not following the TSA on Instagram (@TSA) you are missing the best account on the planet. It’s a combination of the most humorous items they find in carry on bags and the least humorous captions you’ve ever read.

Here’s one of my favorites.

Who knew that:

1. People purchased batarangs/brass knuckles.

2. People tried to fly with batarangs/brass knuckles.

I bet that guy’s girlfriend was so mad at the airport. I’m kidding, there’s no way you have a batarang and a girlfriend.

Do you see how fast I can take the serious into the silly if I get uncomfortable?

It’s an escape hatch for me, one of many. I bet you’ve got some escape hatches too, but they don’t protect you from real awkwardness, they just prevent you from real connection.

“I’m lying, what about you?”

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