You guys have no idea how many times I did something like this...

You guys have no idea how many times I did something like this when I lived in the apartment by the duck pond. 

One time I was feeding the ducks and an Overly Aggressive Duck was hogging all the food from the rest so I knelt down, smacked his little duck bum, and shouted (maybe too loud, but he’d done stuff like this before, and I wasn’t having any of his shit), “No more for you! Stop it!”

And a group of teenage boys walking across the pathway stopped, stared, and burst into laughter at the crazy girl not only talking to the ducks, but scolding them.

Ducks do things to people.