Can You Fix These Grammar Problems?

A dear efriend–Ankur Mithal over at Dark Office Humour–posted a list of funny signs found around the area. I got a good laugh over them and then my muse pointed out they were a great opportunity for grammar lessons.

After all, we are grammaraticians, neologists, and writing experts. Who better than us to fix these signs in need of a comma, word rearrangement, or toss in the trash.

Read the list below and add a comment about how you would correct the errant grammar that led to the misunderstood message:

In an office:

TOILET OUT OF ORDER������. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:

AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In a London department store:

BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS

In an office:

WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:

AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD
Outside a second-hand shop:

WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING ��� BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:

CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park:

ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:

FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN���T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer���s field:

THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
On a repair shop door:

WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR ��� THE BELL DOESN���T WORK).

How many could you fix?

More on grammar:

Writer���s Tip #29: No Exclamation Points!��Please!

Do You Make These Writing��Blunders?

Writer���s Tip #23: The Use of ���Lay���

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Jacqui Murray is the author of the popular Building a Midshipman, the story of her daughter���s journey from high school to United States Naval Academy. She is the author/editor of dozens of books on integrating tech into education, webmaster for six blogs, an Amazon Vine Voice book reviewer, a columnist for Examiner.com and TeachHUB, Editorial Review Board member for Journal for Computing Teachers, monthly contributor to Today���s Author and a freelance journalist on tech ed topics. You can find her book at her publisher���s website, Structured Learning.��

 

Filed under: grammar and spelling