Dreaming and Writing

I had my worst recurring anxiety dream last night, with some ugly variations on it, and started my day with a heart-pounding anxiety that no matter what I did today it wouldn't be enough. Luckily I was aware of the fact that this was only a feeling I had, and although it had a physical component too, I could at least try to shift it rather than just running around like a doomed headless chicken.

What my body wanted me to do was start gouging away at the worst-feeling things on my to-do list. Market myself whether I felt up to it or not. Beg and plead for reviews, because dear God, my last release is a sinking ship. Do all the crap stuff I should be saving for throwaway times in the day. And I didn't do any of that. I did a meditation to help calm myself down, then I gently suggested to myself that I open up my work in progress and see if I could write.

I did write. I liked what I wrote, which is always a relief. I feel good now, and that weird feeling of impending failure is just a little echo.

All I can really control is my frame of mind, so heck, I might as well try. It feels a lot better than to be the weirdo who scrambled around all day feeling helpless.
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Published on March 13, 2015 09:24
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message 1: by Jax (last edited Mar 13, 2015 01:57PM) (new)

Jax Is Life is Awesome actually not doing well? Or was that part of the unease leftover from the dream? I thought it had a good following & I've seen nothing but great reviews. It would be a crime if it's not finding an audience. That series is so good!


message 2: by Jordan (new)

Jordan Price Jax wrote: "Is Life is Awesome actually not doing well?..."

It's not selling well, unfortunately, and the number of Amazon reviews is significantly lower than similar books in the genre. I try not to get distressed about things that aren't in my control but it's a challenge.


message 3: by Rebo (new)

Rebo Glad you were able to write and feel better. I have my own recurring anxiety dreams... They're the strangest things, always different, but with the same theme, and later, after I've woken up and gotten over the anxiety of the dream, I have no idea why I was so scared in the dreams themselves... :S Strange things.


message 4: by Jordan (new)

Jordan Price Rebecca wrote: "Glad you were able to write and feel better. I have my own recurring anxiety dreams... "

I have a subset of anxiety dreams that's less distressing, those are the ones where I have to take an exam for a class I've never attended, or perform in a play I've never rehearsed. I wake up from those and think, "Oh how dumb." But the really bad ones that haunt me all day involve animals dying and me helpless to save them...they're horribly realistic and they really, really suck.


message 5: by Jax (new)

Jax Jordan wrote: "It's not selling well, unfortunately..."

I had already posted a review here, so I added it over at Amazon just now too.

Hopefully sales will pick up when all those people who don't start series until all parts are out get caught up. They're probably reading books 1 or 2 now and will get to 3 soon. Fingers crossed!


message 6: by Rebo (new)

Rebo Jordan wrote: "Rebecca wrote: "Glad you were able to write and feel better. I have my own recurring anxiety dreams... "

I have a subset of anxiety dreams that's less distressing, those are the ones where I have ..."


The funny thing about mine is that during the dream the anxiety and fear is as strong as anything, and it lasts for a bit when I wake up, but then I'm like, why the heck was I so keyed up about it? Strange. Still, anxiety dreams of any sort are no fun. Good luck with the book sales. I know it can be frustrating. :(


message 7: by Jordan (new)

Jordan Price Jax wrote: "I had already posted a review here, so I added it over at Amazon just now too. "

Thanks, that's really helpful!!!


message 8: by Antonella (new)

Antonella Jordan wrote: "It's not selling well, unfortunately, and the number of Amazon reviews is significantly lower than similar books in the ..."

I'm sorry to hear this. I loved it and left an enthusiastic review.


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