Dealing in Disappointment
The Big D-----Disappointment.
It's one of the toughest realities around, isn't it?
Our first ones come early in life. We don't get the toy we're reaching for. We can't have the dog's bone to chew on (why not? HE likes it!). We aren't able to stay up late with our older siblings to watch whatever is so tantalizingly forbidden on TV. We aren't allowed to go as Jack the Ripper for Halloween. Our pee-wee sports team loses every game one season. We can't have a car the split second we turn 16. We won't get into the college of our choice. Our books aren't best sellers. Our spouses lie to us. Our kids get speeding tickets....
While it is something we deal in at least on some level every day (what do you MEAN the parking garage is full? You're OUT of the appetizer I want?) I would wager that it really never gets easier.
As a parent, you get to experience a whole new level of disappointment. Not the kind you INFLICT on your kids (No, you can't stay out until 2 a.m. you're only 16 years old young lady). But the kind inflicted upon them by life.
It's been said that having a child is like living your entire life watching your very heart walk around, unprotected, outside your body. I would agree, having done it three times over.
This week was a mixed bag for the Wenchlings. Numero Uno made a Serious Life Stage Choice and accepted placement at the University of Tennessee College of Pharmacy. He had other offers, one of them in-state and oh-so-much-cheaper. However, the kid did his research and determined that the $60k+ a year debt load he may very take on was worth the payoff. UT is a top ranked program and he gets to attend at campuses in Memphis, Knoxville and Nashville--three pretty amazing cities (being the Southern boy in his soul that he is despite being raised overseas and in the Great Middle West). That was terrifying/exciting in equal measure. We are proud of him to say the least.
Wenchling Numero Dos has been accepted into 3 out of the 4 programs she applied to in Environmental Engineering here in Michigan. Wayne State, Eastern Michigan and Michigan Tech are all eager to have her. We'll see how eager once the scholarship monies start getting divvied up this spring. But she has powered through 2 years at community college, living on her own, working a job and getting A's.
On the flip side, the Soccer Wenchling was dealt one of the first major disappointments a budding athlete can get, when she was told by a Division 1 university that had been talking directly to her, telling her "just give us a few more weeks/months. We want to have you. You're an amazing student and player," that they had decided against having her. OK, technically this was not the first one. Another one she was less interested in had said, after we got a nearly day-long tour of their campus with a coach and watched them play (get thumped by) a rival team that their 2016 class was "full already." But his one....this one she wanted (and had been kind of strung along for a year thinking she might get....)
Now, I know that finding a place in women's D1 soccer is the writers' equivalent of being the next EL James. Girls soccer (novels trying to make their authors the "next EL James") is way oversubscribed. There are only so many places (readers? money?) for them to play. All around her girls in the Class of 2016 like herself are tweeting and posting about "committing" here and there and everywhere to play (that NYT BSA designation keeps popping up for more and more authors/and yeah, $400 million so, we all know what that number means).
Honestly, right now, "Disappointment" feels like too tame a word for this. You work as hard as anyone, play harder than some, attend camps, tours, communicate with coaches as you're told, pay for videos, recruiting sites, attend more camps, more training, more weights, and yet.....
You write, sometimes as many as 6 books in a calendar year. You pay for actual, professional editing. You revise. You re-edit. You pay for top notch covers. You buy as many promotions as your budget allows. You beg, borrow, pimp, sign, appear, travel, buy swag you can't afford and yet.....
Luckily we humans are more or less wired to rebound from adversity. We mope, cry, drink a bottle of wine/eat a carton of ice cream, scream, throw things, swear we are gonna "quit." But we don't.
She won't give up. Something better will emerge. Yes it involves us schlepping around to 5 different camps this winter and her attending her super awesome and brutally painful training at Barwiss Methods (I love those guys). She has her high school season coming up but we'll intersperse that with one or more of the zillions of "combines" thrown at me via email.
I won't give up either. I have an agent to snag. I know there is someone out there who will see my potential, my already-built platform, my backlist and my thick skin as an opportunity make money for us both. Mind you, I have amassed no less than 14 rejections in less than 3 weeks. But hey, their loss. Kind of like that school that took a pass on my awesome soccer student/athlete.
Disappointment. Turning it into motivation is not easy. But it's the only real option.
***************************************************
So see above for the "begging, borrowing, pimping" and note the following amazing deal:
I will offer up my top selling, fan-favorite STEWART REALTY series for...oh...um....let's say....$12.00 for all 9 books.
Here is how I view it. My man Jack Gordon spent hours and hours and hours (and hours) at empty open houses, driving around buyers who never bought, sat through continuing education, drove around more non-buying buyers, sat in more empty open houses.....and he did not give up.
I won't either.
The Stewart Realty original trilogy is about a couple who hook-up first, fall for each other later. There is a very mild BDSM element to is. It is NOT 50 Shades of Grey. But if you thought that was hot/interesting I GUARANTEE you will adore these novels---it's even a bit more risky than some, because I DARE you to NOT find this realistic couple as hot as any of 'em.
All the books are on Amazon.
They're also on B&N, Smash, Ibooks.
I'm throwing a HUGE Stewart Realty party on Friday, Feb. 27 with some amazing guest authors as hosts:
ATTENDING AUTHORS:
7-8AM Liz Crowe
8-9AM Susan Child
9-10AM Elise Faber
12-1PM Debra Presley
1-2PM Al Parks
2-3PM Jamie Salisbury
3-4PM Sandra Shrewsbury
4-5PM Nina Levine
5-6PM D. Kelly
6-7PM Deanndra Hall
7-8PM Audrey Carlan
8-9PM Jack Gordon
9-10PM Liz Crowe
***yeah, Jack himself will make an appearance at 8 p.m. and he's pretty stoked***
I am a notorious prize-giver at these things so don't miss my intro at 7 a.m. or my wrap up at 9 p.m.!
We have an equally gigantic prize pack with all sorts of unique goodies as part of this.
Enter here:
a Rafflecopter giveaway
It's one of the toughest realities around, isn't it?
Our first ones come early in life. We don't get the toy we're reaching for. We can't have the dog's bone to chew on (why not? HE likes it!). We aren't able to stay up late with our older siblings to watch whatever is so tantalizingly forbidden on TV. We aren't allowed to go as Jack the Ripper for Halloween. Our pee-wee sports team loses every game one season. We can't have a car the split second we turn 16. We won't get into the college of our choice. Our books aren't best sellers. Our spouses lie to us. Our kids get speeding tickets....
While it is something we deal in at least on some level every day (what do you MEAN the parking garage is full? You're OUT of the appetizer I want?) I would wager that it really never gets easier.
As a parent, you get to experience a whole new level of disappointment. Not the kind you INFLICT on your kids (No, you can't stay out until 2 a.m. you're only 16 years old young lady). But the kind inflicted upon them by life.
It's been said that having a child is like living your entire life watching your very heart walk around, unprotected, outside your body. I would agree, having done it three times over.
This week was a mixed bag for the Wenchlings. Numero Uno made a Serious Life Stage Choice and accepted placement at the University of Tennessee College of Pharmacy. He had other offers, one of them in-state and oh-so-much-cheaper. However, the kid did his research and determined that the $60k+ a year debt load he may very take on was worth the payoff. UT is a top ranked program and he gets to attend at campuses in Memphis, Knoxville and Nashville--three pretty amazing cities (being the Southern boy in his soul that he is despite being raised overseas and in the Great Middle West). That was terrifying/exciting in equal measure. We are proud of him to say the least.
Wenchling Numero Dos has been accepted into 3 out of the 4 programs she applied to in Environmental Engineering here in Michigan. Wayne State, Eastern Michigan and Michigan Tech are all eager to have her. We'll see how eager once the scholarship monies start getting divvied up this spring. But she has powered through 2 years at community college, living on her own, working a job and getting A's.
On the flip side, the Soccer Wenchling was dealt one of the first major disappointments a budding athlete can get, when she was told by a Division 1 university that had been talking directly to her, telling her "just give us a few more weeks/months. We want to have you. You're an amazing student and player," that they had decided against having her. OK, technically this was not the first one. Another one she was less interested in had said, after we got a nearly day-long tour of their campus with a coach and watched them play (get thumped by) a rival team that their 2016 class was "full already." But his one....this one she wanted (and had been kind of strung along for a year thinking she might get....)
Now, I know that finding a place in women's D1 soccer is the writers' equivalent of being the next EL James. Girls soccer (novels trying to make their authors the "next EL James") is way oversubscribed. There are only so many places (readers? money?) for them to play. All around her girls in the Class of 2016 like herself are tweeting and posting about "committing" here and there and everywhere to play (that NYT BSA designation keeps popping up for more and more authors/and yeah, $400 million so, we all know what that number means).
Honestly, right now, "Disappointment" feels like too tame a word for this. You work as hard as anyone, play harder than some, attend camps, tours, communicate with coaches as you're told, pay for videos, recruiting sites, attend more camps, more training, more weights, and yet.....
You write, sometimes as many as 6 books in a calendar year. You pay for actual, professional editing. You revise. You re-edit. You pay for top notch covers. You buy as many promotions as your budget allows. You beg, borrow, pimp, sign, appear, travel, buy swag you can't afford and yet.....
Luckily we humans are more or less wired to rebound from adversity. We mope, cry, drink a bottle of wine/eat a carton of ice cream, scream, throw things, swear we are gonna "quit." But we don't.
She won't give up. Something better will emerge. Yes it involves us schlepping around to 5 different camps this winter and her attending her super awesome and brutally painful training at Barwiss Methods (I love those guys). She has her high school season coming up but we'll intersperse that with one or more of the zillions of "combines" thrown at me via email.
I won't give up either. I have an agent to snag. I know there is someone out there who will see my potential, my already-built platform, my backlist and my thick skin as an opportunity make money for us both. Mind you, I have amassed no less than 14 rejections in less than 3 weeks. But hey, their loss. Kind of like that school that took a pass on my awesome soccer student/athlete.
Disappointment. Turning it into motivation is not easy. But it's the only real option.
***************************************************
So see above for the "begging, borrowing, pimping" and note the following amazing deal:
I will offer up my top selling, fan-favorite STEWART REALTY series for...oh...um....let's say....$12.00 for all 9 books.
Here is how I view it. My man Jack Gordon spent hours and hours and hours (and hours) at empty open houses, driving around buyers who never bought, sat through continuing education, drove around more non-buying buyers, sat in more empty open houses.....and he did not give up.
I won't either.
The Stewart Realty original trilogy is about a couple who hook-up first, fall for each other later. There is a very mild BDSM element to is. It is NOT 50 Shades of Grey. But if you thought that was hot/interesting I GUARANTEE you will adore these novels---it's even a bit more risky than some, because I DARE you to NOT find this realistic couple as hot as any of 'em.
All the books are on Amazon.
They're also on B&N, Smash, Ibooks.
I'm throwing a HUGE Stewart Realty party on Friday, Feb. 27 with some amazing guest authors as hosts:
ATTENDING AUTHORS:
7-8AM Liz Crowe
8-9AM Susan Child
9-10AM Elise Faber
12-1PM Debra Presley
1-2PM Al Parks
2-3PM Jamie Salisbury
3-4PM Sandra Shrewsbury
4-5PM Nina Levine
5-6PM D. Kelly
6-7PM Deanndra Hall
7-8PM Audrey Carlan
8-9PM Jack Gordon
9-10PM Liz Crowe
***yeah, Jack himself will make an appearance at 8 p.m. and he's pretty stoked***
I am a notorious prize-giver at these things so don't miss my intro at 7 a.m. or my wrap up at 9 p.m.!
We have an equally gigantic prize pack with all sorts of unique goodies as part of this.
Enter here:
a Rafflecopter giveaway
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