New TSA Methods

What's the difference between molestation and security? A TSA badge, apparently. I'm supposed to stand there in front of a crowd of strangers and have some uniformed stranger in rubber gloves feel me up? I at least want the option of an opposite-sex partner. I mean, why shouldn't I have a little fun, too?

I'll take the radiation see-under-your-clothes-machine, thank you.

I wonder if there's been a big spike in closet perverts applying to the TSA?

I want to feel secure when I fly, but not violated. This is just too friggin' much.