Terrorists and Self-Acceptance

Terrorists and Self-Acceptance

Look at What I Created

What happened in France last week shocked the world. The cold-blooded murders were bad enough, but what really pushed everyone’s buttons was that it was the direct challenge and affront to our values, especially freedom of expression.

(Note: The U.S. limits this more than most. Any American proclaiming “Je suis Charlie,” should realize the U.S. would never have allowed that paper to exist in the first place. That’s probably why they didn’t send someone in high office to participate in the parade of other world leaders.)

But in terms of the pure violence displayed on that day, it was nothing compared to the sickening, ongoing violence, especially against women, that is happening daily in Nigeria, Syria, Iraq, North Korea, and many other parts of the world, almost all of it in the name of some religion or another.  

But consider this. According to the law of cause and effect, it is a spiritual principle that whatever is occurring ‘out there’ is a reflection of what is ‘in here.’ Whatever is showing up in the world is a projection of our own consciousness (beliefs, ideas, attitudes, and prejudices.)

Wow! Look what we created!

Not very pretty, to say the least. But that’s how it is, right now. Accept it.

Feel the pain – OK, but stop judging it. Everything happens for a reason, remember?

Do we know what the reason is? No. Of course, not.

But this much we do know:

The terrorists [our healing angels?] have got our attention. They are showing each one of us what we need to heal in ourselves: e.g. intolerance, violence, control and manipulation, lust for power, manic religiosity, mysogyny, cruelty, hatred, etc., before we can have peace within ourselves and in the world.

So, is action NOT called for? Yes, it is. Absolutely.

Here’s what you need to do if you want to make a difference in whatever is happening that you find upsetting. And it doesn’t matter if it’s a world event or something very local and personal. It’s all the same process – taking back the projection and healing our minds.

Taking back the projection is the easy part. This is done simply by realizing that what you see out there is what you need to love and accept in yourself. You then forgive the ‘mirror’ on that account, using the Radical Forgiveness worksheet.

The real challenge, though is coming to love and accept those aspects of your ‘shadow-stuff’ being mirrored back to you from ‘out there.’

And yes, I did say, loving and accepting. Not rejecting, releasing or any words that typify too many approaches to healing one’s shadow. They don’t work.

Every one of the qualities I listed earlier (intolerance, violence, control and manipulation, lust for power, manic religiosity, misogyny, cruelty, hatred, etc., that the terrorists are mirroring for us, are sustained by a belief, or set of beliefs, of some kind.

For example:   “I will be a victim unless I strike first.” “Other people are responsible for my happiness.” “My religion gives me permission to be immoral and relieves me of responsibility if I believe it is God’s will.” “The world is an unsafe place.” “I have to kill or be killed.” “I have to be violent to get attention.” “Women are less than men,” “Women should be kept in their place;” “Women are dangerous.” “I have to be in control.” “I need to have power over others to feel good about myself.” “It’s not OK to speak the truth.” “My religion is the only religion.” “If I die after killing a lot of people, I will be rewarded in heaven.”

So a good place, to start, is to look at what the ‘mirror’ is showing you – and you can tell what it is by how much judgment (energy) you have around it – and then look inside to see if you have a belief in you that might promote you acting this way yourself.

Even if you cannot be specific, just focus on the ‘mirror’ (terrorists) and all that it represents. Then pray, meditate or do a Self-Acceptance worksheet for help in coming to love yourself for having these beliefs, as well as loving and accepting the beliefs that underly the behavior.

You have to love them as part of who you have been up to now, and be open to the possibility that they have served you in some way. Love them for what they have done for you, even if you can’t see it.

I know. It’s totally counterintuitive, isn’t it? Love my violent streak? My mysogynistic ideas? The part of me that can be cruel? Love them? You must be kidding!

I’m not kidding. It is the only way, I promise. I’m sure you have heard “what you resist, persists, right?”  If you resist the energy by trying to release it from a place of judgment, it will only become stronger.  You have to love them. Only then will they lose their power.

So, I hope you can now see that to ask “How do I get rid of these beliefs?” is to ask the wrong question.  The real question is, “How can I get to a point where I can lovingly accept my belief, and love myself completely for having it, so I can let it dissolve naturally?” 

Beliefs are not just benign things that exist as connections in the brain which can be turned off just like that.  They exist as an integral part of your Self. 

That means, if you make the beliefs wrong and try to get rid of them, you are actually attacking and undermining your own Self.  You will fight that tooth and nail, of course. You might even start a war over it!

This is why we need Radical Self-Empowerment as a resource to help us get there. It’s actually a fusion of Radical Self-Forgiveness and Radical Self-Acceptance; in essence, self-love. Along with other worksheets, you can download one for free from this website in the Free Stuff section of Colin’s Cafe.

On the free combination Self-Forgiveness/Self-Acceptance worksheet, it suggests you use all those ‘mirrors’ in your life to identify all your subconscious beliefs that you hate to own.

Then, to go through them to see how you might have been shamed by someone into thinking you were that.

If that is the grounds on which you formed that idea about yourself, it will fall away upon that realization. (You might also need to do a Radical Forgiveness worksheet on the person who shamed you.)

Second, see which of those qualities you are willing to own and love, even if they are true and reflective of who you are today. No judgment is allowed.

Self-acceptance is all about loving you just the way you are. The goal is to come to the full realization that your perfection lies in your imperfection.

I’m not OK;

You’re not OK.

But that’s perfectly OK. That’s how it’s meant to be.