The Cheese Dancing Phenomenon
Dripfeed Pantechnicon is arguably the UK���s leading celebrity cheese-diversity awareness officer. Up until the staggering breakout success of Celebrity Name That Cheese Dance-Off, cheese awareness was not the well-recognised sport it has now become. All over the UK since the programme became a staple of early-evening schedules on Saturdays, cheese awareness teams dance off matches have been taking place across the country.
It was the way that celebrity socialite Grimsby Premierhotel, and her professional cheese awareness partner, Dripfeed Pantechnicon, performed an almost perfect Wensyledale Tango, on the Christmas special two years ago, that changed attitudes. Many claim that single performance bought cheese dancing out of the shadows and into the limelight.
Many UK supermarkets have responded to this surge in demand for the more danceable cheeses by opening their cheese and dairy aisles for special dance nights. Where anyone can come along for a quick Double Gloucester waltz or try disco dancing with some Caerphilly. These have been a great success, with the sales of the dancing cheeses doubling or even tripling over the more pedestrian non-dancing cheeses.
However, some cheese manufacturers have complained that some cheeses ��� even traditional cheeses ��� have suffered because of their lack of any formal dance associated with them. Brie in particular has suffered, mainly because ��� as we all know ��� French cheeses are not really suitable for dancing. Especially the cheeses like Camembert, which can become too runny under the hot dance lights for anything more than a quick rumba.
However, many others have also cited Dripfeed Pantechnicon���s ability to perform most of the more exacting Latin dances whilst preparing his crackers for the Stilton as an event that had raised the profile of cheese dancing. Especially for those amateurs who have only ever taken a small wedge of cheddar out onto the dance floor at their local club.
Although, there are some people who hark back to the seventies, a time when the famous Wigan cheese all-nighters were such popular occasions. Times that saw a great deal of Cheshire cheese not only danced with, but also consumed in order to fuel a night of non-stop cheese dancing.
However, Dripfeed Pantechnicon himself says that the dancing ��� despite the fame and fortune it has bought him ��� is still not enough for him. He says he hopes – one day – to return to just undertaking straightforward cheese awareness, especially in deprived communities. Some of those communities have never seen Sage Derby or tasted Red Leicester, let alone danced a waltz holding a slice of Gouda.
Many fans believe it will be a sad day for cheese dancing should this ever come to pass. A good many people would argue that the TV programme has done far more to realise cheese awareness amongst the ordinary people of this country than no end of cheese awareness courses ever could. But the British public must learn to accept Dripfeed Pantechnicon���s decision, no matter how much it will spoil what has now become another great British Saturday night TV tradition.
