Binga’s New Year’s Resolutions for Everyone Else But Her

Am I old enough to start referring to her as The Peanut Gallery, like Sparkle used to?


In 2011 and 2013, Sparkle made some New Year’s resolutions for her human. I was going to carry on this tradition for 2015, but Binga just told me that Sparkle gave her the job of doing New Year’s resolutions. I don’t know if I believe her. Do you? Anyhow, I figured I had better let her do it. You know how torties get when you try to tell them no.


Oh, and she says the resolutions are for everybody in the house. Except for herself.


Supposedly, this is her serious and earnest expression


1. From now on, I get treats before and after the dog gets walked, not just after. But just me, not the pipsqueak.


2. If my human is late getting up to feed me, I am allowed to bite her on the nose as punishment.


3. Boodie must let me taste her food, even if it’s same food as I have in my dish and I haven’t finished my dinner.


4. No more late dinners! Feed me promptly at 6 PM. Oh, and I guess the other cats too.


5. All new catnip toys must be given to me to pass my inspection first, and I decide if any other cat gets to play with them.


6. If the pipsqueak is doing a photo session, I am allowed to interrupt it, and no griping from her or the photographer.


7. I can do anything I want, so everyone had better stop complaining.


Can we please ignore these?


I’m not so sure these are in the real spirit of New Year’s resolutions. But whatever.
* * *

Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” Sparkle had answers to many annoying problems in her two award-winning books! Visit her author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of her awesome Dear Sparkle books!


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Published on January 01, 2015 00:10
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