Ever Wonder Why Somewhere Upon High?

So have you ever wondered why Santa is so jolly at your sea? I bet you have, just like me. What was your deduction that came due? I will tell you with one hundred percent certainty why at my zoo.

Is it because he is kind?
Nope, not why jolly you find.
Even with bad grammar at my sea,
He still is not jolly.

Because he has so many pets?
They could out number the Mets.
Maybe those reindeer could win as well.
But nope, not why he's jolly as hell.

Because he gets cookies all the time?
He long ago got out of his prime.
They just make him want to give a call,
To any weight watchers near his hall.

Because he can sing cheery songs?
Who doesn't like sing a longs?
Yeah, that would be the cat.
So nope, not that.

Those elves he has as slaves?
Cheap labor saves.
That may make him happy,
But the elves are too yappy.

Because he has magic?
Nah, that is a bit tragic.
Has to go down chimney's everywhere.
Just imagine what is in there.

Because he gets played by 100's of guys,
Who just love his jolly disguise?
Nope, he doesn't like the fakes.
Ever wonder why there are earthquakes?

Because he gets movies made of him?
Nope, too many are grim.
I mean Ernest P. World saved the day.
That right there can cause dismay.

Is it because he has a nice ride?
Nope, in it he may take pride.
But that is about it.
The flying may make him happy a bit.

But the real reason is easy as can be.
He already knows at every single sea,
Where the older naughty girls live.
He goes there to umm forgive.

There you go, mystery solved at my show. Now you know what he does the other 364 days of the year. No wonder he has such Christmas cheer. All those cookies must cause quite the amount of gas. Bet it is way more than what comes out my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.