I feel like I’ve been very still lately. And not in a good way but where I feel like I’m...

I feel like I’ve been very still lately. And not in a good way but where I feel like I’m incredibly sad but feel absolutely nothing at the same time. I’m trying my hardest to get myself back but a lot of the time it’s painful to keep peeling yourself for people who don’t want any of it and my insecurity has gotten to a point where I doubt every good and warm thing said to me and where every bad thing is amplified by at least a hundred. What I’m trying to say is that I’m still trying to become the light and its an awful struggle but I hope I get there someday soon.