Too Much Stuff: Later

Usually the idea is that I rewrite the scene after you all weigh in and we talk about the rewrite, but Toni and I started looking at our two opening scenes last night and realized we were on different planets, so we’re revamping the beginning so we can both get what we need on the page. Which means that by the time we’re done, this is probably going to be the third scene. Or the first. Anyway, back much later, we’re rewriting. And thank you very much for your critiques; they were very helpful.